2010!

It's hard to believe that we're marking the beginning of the second decade of this century! I remember clearly where I was and what I was doing 10 years ago as we awaited the dawn of 2000. It was the time of Y2k....seems so silly now, but some people took it so seriously. The Kid and I were the only ones home for new year's eve (I don't remember where the girls were), and we played games on the computer to pass the time until midnight--no blogs or Facebook then to keep us occupied. At midnight we watched the time turn over (correctly) on our computer, and had some sparkling cider to toast the new year.

This year it's the two of us again. The Kid was supposed to be away visiting his high school friends, but he woke up sick this morning and had to delay his departure. So we're sitting here with our laptops, awaiting 2010, and we'll have sparkling cider again. Maybe I'll try out my new popcorn maker, too.

So much has happened in the last ten years. At the beginning of 2000 I was going up for tenure, and discerning my call to the priesthood. My three older kids were all in college, and the Kid was in 3rd grade. Now the girls are both married and mothers, the Kid is in college and Elder Son is in grad school. My father, mother-in-law, and father-in-law all died of cancer, and my mother has moved into assisted living. 9/11 happened, and I went off to seminary and was ordained. I've moved three times. I've made new friends and reconnected with old ones. And all that just barely conveys how my life has changed. I wonder what the next 10 years will bring?

Happy New Year everyone. May 2010 be filled with good things for all.

2009--the good, the bad, and the ugly

Where to start? I think I'll go in reverse order:

The Ugly:

~I will remember 2009 in large part by the truly abominable behavior I experienced from some colleagues, primarily my former boss. As I've reflected over it the last few months, I still find myself not quite believing how reprehensible some of it was, and how completely unnecessary. But if nothing else, I learned a lot about how NOT to interact with people, how NOT to manage staff, and about how I react under stress--both positively and negatively.

The Bad:

~Job stress. Lots of it, much remaining unbloggable. Really, it's remarkable how much that defined my life for the first two-thirds of the year (and see the Ugly, above). While things had been stressful for much of my tenure there, I couldn't have foreseen how hard the last year there would turn out to be.

~Moving stress--no matter if the move is positive, packing and moving is HARD physically and psychologically. I've done it many times, and I know how to get it done efficiently, but it never gets easier.

The Good:

~Family--Baby J thrives, and I was privileged to baptize her at the Easter Vigil. WW got married, and Mr. WW arrived from Nepal in time for Baby M's birth. The Kid graduated from high school, and survived his first semester of college. I got used to living alone.We had a wonderful Thanksgiving together in my great new house, and celebrated Christmas together in VT.

~Friends--took care of me in so many ways when I was totally stressed out, and rejoiced with me when things turned around. I discovered deep wells of caring and concern and generosity of spirit, sometimes from completely unexpected places. And I reconnected with some old friends via FB.

~Colleagues--rallied around me when I needed them. My clergy coach and his wife went above and beyond the call of duty to support and encourage me. I don't know where I'd be without them.

~A wonderful new parish--my new church has been warm and welcoming and seems truly happy to have me here. There are many challenges to face here, and I know the honeymoon will not last forever, but it is so nice to start out positively. I am so happy to be here, and I feel really lucky and blessed that I ended up in a good place.

And that's 2009 in a nutshell.

December!

Where did the month go?

After NaBloPoMo, I had every intention of continuing to blog, and I found myself thinking occassionally, "That'll blog!" but somehow, the posts never got written. So here's the month in random bits:

~The month started with a wonderful liturgy installing me as rector and celebrating our new ministry together as a parish. Some of my favorite people from my former parish traveled up to attend, and my clergy coach preached. It was a truly fantastic evening. And the next day was my birthday.

~I managed NOT to have the Christmas blues--I can't remember the last time that happened. Really. I can't remember.

~But I have to say that when Christmas Eve came, it took me a bit to feel the magic. Church on Christmas Eve is different here. Not bad, necessarily, but different.

~No Christmas pageant this year, and I'm surprised how much I missed it. But I did invite all the kids at the 5:00 service to come up front, and I read them the Christmas story from a Tomie DePaola book--and I saved the magi part for our Epiphany celebration on January 6.

~Another priest on FB who is in a new church remarked how much easier things would be when she wasn't doing everything for the first time. I think that is a wise observation. Just figuring out how things are "customarily" done is exhausting sometimes. And balancing the whole "of course you can do whatever you want" v. "we can't change anything!" scenario requires a lot of ....tact, to say the least.

~I had presents bought earlier than ever (but not that early by some standards, I suppose) and got the tree up in a timely manner, but I still found myself with too much to do on Christmas Eve. Which makes no sense, because I had so much less to do this year at work than last.

~The Kid and I went to Vermont on Christmas day as soon as I finished church to have Christmas with the NSLS and WW families. Baby J has a new kitchen and loves to cook. "Sit, Amma!" she says, and "Cook!" Then she gives me an ice cream cone. And Baby M is growing fast!

~Unbelievably, my camera never came out of my camera bag while I was away. Don't know how that happened. I did take a few pix with my phone but it's not the same.

~Too many deaths around Christmas....a good friend's father died on the 23rd, a priest colleague from my former diocese dies on December 24th, as did someone from my former parish in VT. I went to her funeral on Tuesday. It was the first time I'd been back to that parish since the week I was ordained as a deacon, and it was good to reconnect as we celebrated P's long and full life.

~We made it home yesterday between snow storms--here and there. I seem to have lost my driving-in-the-snow mojo, and I need to get it back. I live at the top of a hill, and I worry about getting up (and down!) when the roads are messy, although I did okay when I went to get groceries this morning.

~I won't be sorry to see 2009 out. What a year--the good, the bad, and the ugly. At least it ended on an upbeat. That should be a separate post, actually.

~What will 2010 bring in the blogosphere? When I click through my blogroll, I see so many abandoned or taken down blogs. There are voices I miss. But people move on....that's life. It will be interesting to see how blogging/fb/twitter play out in the next year.

Ding dong, the witch is dead

I spent the whole day today out shopping--I went to a very large mall in one direction because the Apple store is there, and I needed my computer worked on. And when I finished up there (some four hours later!) I went to Whole Foods in the opposite direction. Driving home it hit me--it's December 14, most of my shopping is done, and I don't have the Christmas grumpies yet! How did THAT happen?

Seriously, it's the first time that I can remember that the whole Christmas to-do hasn't depressed me to some extent--whether it was the shopping or work or what. Of course, there are still 11 days to go. And I have tons of work to do--sermons, bulletins, buying and decorating the tree, wrapping the gifts. I could still succumb. But something feels different this year--it feels lighter somehow. And I'm not complaining!

Cuteness

NaBloPoMo NoMo

It's November 30, and I made it--I posted every day, although there was a lot of filler. (I am reminded of my friend D's blog title On Not Being a Sausage, which comes from the teachings of Silvanus: "Do not be a sausage which is full of useless things," and feeling very sausagey myself!) It was a discipline if nothing else.

They say that the older you are, the faster time goes by, and I must say that I am finding that to be true. It seems impossible that the whole month of November has passed already. December will be even faster, I know, with the rush to Christmas. I bought my first Christmas present today, which puts me (for the moment) ahead of where I usually am this time of the year. And I got the Advent calendars out of the attic (I have several reusable ones.) Liturgically, Advent began yesterday, but Advent calendars usually run for the 24 days in December, so tomorrow will be Day 1. My concession to Christmas decorating is to hang one of the Advent calendars on the back door. I need to find something Adventy for the front door, too.

Even though NaBloPoMo is no mo, I am going to keep writing. Maybe I'll even have something to say :)

Fall pictures

I took these about a month ago...decided to quit futzing around with Photoshop for now and just used iPhoto to edit these. Not as sophisticated, but good enough for now.



This one is much better if you click on it to enlarge it.

Lame NaBloPoMo post

It's been a great Thanksgiving weekend, but mow I'm waaaaaay behind on writing my sermon. However, it's also almost the end of the month, and I'll be darned if I'm going to let NaBloPoMo go at this point, so here it is, my lame, last minute, placeholder post.

Not like my last few posts have been much either. I think I was half asleep when I wrote a couple of them. But I shall endeavor to finish the month with a flourish if I can!

Christmas is coming

Last night I looked out the front windows to see Christmas lights in all directions--'candles' in the windows directly across the street, lights outlining the roof line at another, light-adorned shrubbery at at third--everwhere I looked were Christmas decorations. Apparently all my neighbor used Thanksgiving Day as an opportune time to get ready for Christmas.

Actually these weren't the first decorations I'd seen; last week while driving to get a haircut I passed a yard adorned on the one side with a huge inflatable turkey, and on the other with an equally large (and obnoxious) Santa.

I guess I'm old-fashioned; certainly my outlook is affected by my occupation, but it's also shaped by tradition, and that tradition holds that Christmas BEGINS on December 24, and culminates on the Feast of the Epiphany, January 6. Clearly I am out of step with 'popular culture.' But oh, how I wshed morre people observed Advent. I wish we could celebrate Thanksgiving without being caught up in the materialism and hoopla of the season to comes--things that really have very little to do with the real reason for Christmas.

What's for dinner?

Thanksgiving at chez Rev. Dr Mom:

Roasted turkey
Cornbread dressing
Homemade cranberry sauce
Mashed potatoes
Sauteed green-beans
Roasted sweet potatoes and onions
Pumpkin cheesecake
Pecan pie

All delicious!

How about you?

Countdown to Thanksgiving

~Kid retrieved from college-check

~Groceries bought--check--after trips to two grocery stores + Tarjay, I think we're set.

~Turkey brining--check

~Pumpkin cheesecake--in the fridge, thanks to NSLS

~Pecan pie--ingredients at the ready for baking tomorrow

~Thanksgiving service--done!

~Happy Thanksgiving Eve!

Uh-huh

Random bits, Facebook style

~Rev. Dr. Mom wishes there were more days between Thanksgiving and the first Sunday in Advent.

~Rev. Dr. Mom wonders why she thought it was a good idea to host the ecumenical Thanksgiving service....and who thought it was a good idea to schedule her celebration of new ministry the very next week. Special bulletins the same week as the newsletter? Not a good idea.

~Rev. Dr. Mom has been crazily baby-proofing her house in anticipation of a visit from Baby J (and Baby M, but he can't get into anything yet.)

~Rev. Dr. Mom is picking the Kid up for Thanksgiving break tomorow--hurrah!

~Rev. Dr. Mom's car needs a new catalytic converter :(

~Rev. Dr. Mom is happy that her new cleaning person is coming tomorrow!

~Rev. Dr. Mom really needs to go to bed now!

NaBloPoMo: It ain't what it used to be

This is my fourth year doing NaBloPoMo (yeah, I was shocked when I realized that, too!) And while I'm glad I'm writing again (even if it hasn't been all that interesting) the experience this year is very different from previous years, especially 2006 and 2007.

I realize in retrospect that I began blogging at what must have been close to the height of the "blogging craze" at least in my little corner of the blogosphere. I quickly found my place in a group of bloggers that were at the intersection of academic, mommy and clergy blogs. So when I did NaBloPoMo the first two times, I already had a group of readers, and I somehow attracted more--my numbers went up both of those years, especially 2007. Last year? Not so much, and this year not at all. I realize I lost most of my readers when I quit blogging last spring, but truthfully, I think readership is down mostly because people have moved on....they're spending more time on FB and Twitter, or they've moved and changed jobs in ways that has impacted their blogging, or their kids have grown older and they're less comfortable blogging about their lives, or they've just lost interest. All of this is natural and normal. And I've had my own blogging "identity crises."

And of course, it's not all about the numbers. But the reality is that I miss many of the voices that were here, people I met here and whom I read regularly. I "know" some of them on FB which is great, but I still miss what felt like a sort of community. And reading status updates keeps me in touch, but I miss the good writing, even when it was on relatively trivial topics.

My life is really different now, too and I've been thinking about how or if that affects my blogging. I'm not quitting yet, but we'll see where this all takes me after NaBloPoMo ends.

Ted Kennedy, faith and politics

Following various links today while doing some research for my sermon, I came across a blog with this clip of Ted Kennedy speaking at Jerry Falwell's Liberty College (now University). It just so happens that I started reading Ted Kennedy's memoir True Compass a couple of days ago, and I find it surprisingly compelling. I've always respected Kennedy (while, yes, acknowledging his many flaws) and you can't live where I did for the last few years without being infected at least a little by the Kennedy mystique, whether you admire or revile them. One of the things that strikes me in the memoir is Kennedy's frequent references to the importance of his faith in shaping his world view--something that I share with him to a great degree. So I found this passage interesting. At some point I need to look up the rest of this speech and see where he goes with it.

Friday Five~Thanksgiving thoughts

The Cure

Lying around all day
with some strange new deep blue
weekend funk, I'm not really asleep
when my sister calls
to say she's just hung up
from talking with Aunt Bertha
who is 89 and ill but managing
to take care of Uncle Frank
who is completely bed ridden.
Aunt Bert says
it's snowing there in Arkansas,
on Catfish Lane, and she hasn't been
able to walk out to their mailbox.
She's been suffering
from a bad case of the mulleygrubs.
The cure for the mulleygrubs,
she tells my sister,
is to get up and bake a cake.
If that doesn't do it, put on a red dress.

-Ginger Andrews (from Hurricane Sisters)


1. What is your cure for the "mulleygrubs"?

Often a nap will do it. Or doing something to distract myself--a good book. Going out for coffee.

2. Where will you be for Thanksgiving?

Right here at chez Rev. Dr. Mom, with NSLS, Mr. LS, and Baby J, WW, Mr. WW, Baby M, and the Kid

3. What foods will be served? Which are traditional for your family?

Free range turkey for the carnivores, cornbread dressing, homemade cranberry sauce, sourdough rolls, roasted veggies, mashed potatoes, pecan pie and pumpkin cheesecake.

The two must-haves no matter what are cornbread dressing and cranberry sauce. Cornbread dressing reminds me of my grandmother, and the cranberry sauce is a favorite of my kids--I've been making it since they were little. This year WW is making sourdough rolls (assuming the starter started) in honor of my mother who made them when my kids were growing up--they were wonderful and perhaps they'll become part of our tradition again.

4. How do you feel about Thanksgiving as a holiday?

I quite like Thanksgiving. These days it gets totally eclipsed by Hallowe'en and Christmas, and I think that's too bad. As a holiday (at least in my family) it has far less baggage than Christmas.

5. In this season of Thanksgiving, what are you grateful for?

I have so much to be grateful for this year--my children and my two beautiful grandchildren, my new position and the wonderful people here, and my clergy coach and his wife, and great friends who have been there for me when things were tough

It's the end of an era and a sad sad day

One of the institutions at my seminary had nothing (and perhaps everything) to do with theological education. Since 1978 Frankie's Deli has been the place seminarians went to be fed, literally and figuratively. Good cheap food and coffee, a carton of OJ or some cat food when you didn't have time to go to the "real" grocery store, the newspaper on Sunday morning--Frankie's was good for all these things and more--a smile, a joke, a quick hug, a word of encouragement. Frankie was "Papi"--father, uncle and grandfather to us all.

Frankie's Deli is a little hole in the wall kind of place--old, crowded, and always just barely up to code, but it is a place fueled by love--and today on FB seminary alumni and friends got the official word that Frankie's is closing at the end of this year. He has lost his lease. It doesn't surprise me, given the reality of real estate in NYC; Frankie almost lost his lease while I was there, but a last minute negotiation saved him. This time, it appears, there will be no such luck. Frankie is in his 70s, and would likely have to retire at some point, but this forced closing is so sad.

Frankie's is important not only to the seminary community but also to the people of the neighborhood, especially the less affluent residents who like in any NYC neighborhood, are scattered around the area, and concentrated just to the south of the seminary. Like the seminarians they flocked to Frankie's not only because it was cheap and convenient but because Frankie cared about them. Once Frankie got to know you, you would never go without if he could help it.

Frankie, you are an icon of all that is good and right in this world. And Chelsea will not be the same without you.

It's a sad, sad day.

18

Happy birthday to the Kid, who turns 18 today. Who must register for the draft. And can now vote.

My kids are officially All Grown Up now, I guess--at least legally :) And that is an amazing thing!

One more thing

~It's repair week here at chez Rev. Dr. Mom. Cnstruction workers started rebuilding my front porch roof on Monday; when they are done there they will take down some of the hall ceiling to repair the leaky bathtub drain pipe. Tomorrow the computer guy comes to install a new hard drive on my office computer.

~And just when I think things are almost all fixed? My check engine light came on and is staying on. Argh!!!

Just saying...

Playing in the leaves

I loved playing in the leaves when I was a kid. We lived in the south, so autumn peaked later than it does in New Enlgand. Between Hallowe'en and Thanksgiving I would spend hours raking up piles of leaves, jumping in them, laying in them, smelling their earthy aroma, and feeling their crunch under my feet. I would collect prime specimens for art projects--ironing them between sheets of waxed paper, or placing paper on top of a leaf to do a crayon rubbing. And I would make my way down the side walk shuffling in the leaves, kicking them up in great swirls in my wake.

My kids loved playing in leaves, too. Often they would do that at Grandma's house b/c we didn't always live in places where leaves were abundant. Somewhere I have pictures of the girls buried in leaves, with only their faces showing, giggling and laughing.

I'm blessed with several mature trees around my house and the church here, and their leaves have been brilliant shades of gold before they fall to carpet the grass in brown and wrinkled "old age." Every week the landscaping company comes with its shredder and leaf blower; in their efficient way they make quick work of the blanket of leaves. But as I watched them go about their business last week, it made me a bit sad that no one had played in those leaves.

Missing the birds

Long-time readers will remember that I fed quite a varied bunch of birds at my last place. When I moved here I set up my feeding station in the back yard and waited to see what would show up. And waited. And waited. For a few weeks it seemed as though there were no birds around. Finally I noticed that the suet was being nibbled on--and sure enough I spotted a hairy woodpecker feasting on it from time to time.

It took about six weeks for one feeder to be emptied--a feeder that was often empty after a day or two before. I've seen a tufted titmouse, and a white-breasted nuthatch, and I think a chickadee. And that's it. No cardinals. No finches. No bluejays. Nada.

The area is largely residential but there are enough woods around that we saw a deer in the field behind the church the first week we were here. I'm afraid the big black cat who lives next door might be part of the problem--he roams freely in my yard and theirs. But I'm hoping that word will spread in the 'hood that there's lots of birdseed to be had here and perhaps some more birds will show up. And I'm really hoping for some orioles next spring!

Friday the 13th

I'm superstitious about some things, but Friday the 13th? Not so much. But I have to say that today--and this week--might be testing that. This week it feels like everything is breaking. I broke the shower head on Monday. My work computer crashed on Wednesday and it turns out that although it is just barely over a year old (just long enough to be out of warranty, of course), it needs a new hard drive. And this afternoon I came home to find water on the floor in the downstairs hallway--looked up to see a big water stain on the ceiling. So water is either seeping in from the front porch roof (which has a broken "yankee gutter" resulting in lots of water damage to the porch roof and is due to be repaired next week) or from the upstairs bathroom--there are no discernible leaks, but the wet ceiling is right under the bathtub, which I take as a bad sign.

Ah, I hope this doesn't become a pattern!

Short takes

~Wireless printing is awesome. Just saying.

~Feeling normal feels so good after a couple of days of feeling crappy.

~Realized this morning that a bad day here is less stressful than some okay days were at my former places. Really, it's amazing how much lighter everything feels.

~I love November. The leaves are mostly gone, but along the edge of the parking lot is a row of trees that are still golden; they were radiant against a grey and gloomy sky this afternoon.

~Thanksgiving is two weeks from today? Yikes, lots to do between now and then!

This week is conspiring against me

After feeling pretty awful Monday and yesterday, I woke up today feeling really good--normal is so nice after crappy, you know? So I went to work full of energy, and vowed to work late since I had a meeting at 6 pm. And then, about 5:00 as I was working away, my computer froze. Nothing would work, so I rebooted it, and guess what--it wouldn't reboot, and I got an error screen (no blue screen of death but maybe you don't get that with Vista?) ARGH! So more than likely everything I did this afternoon is a wash. I just hope I haven't lost everything I've done since I got here.

(Which points out a huge flaw in our system--we aren't networked, and we have NO backup system. So if this happened to the parish administrator's computer, we'd really be up the creek without the proverbial paddle.)

Hopefully we can get the computer tech here in the morning. Sigh.

Blah

The headache I thought might be related to not enough sleep? Was still around today, even though I had a good night's sleep last night. I felt okay when I got up, but felt worse and worse as the day went on. So tired, too. I was worried that I was coming down with something, and I took my temperature when I came home from work, but thankfully no fever, and no other symptoms but headache and general yuckiness.

Which means that I got virtually no work done today. I made a couple of visits this morning (before I started feeling so bad) and installed my shiny new printer in my office this afternoon, and that's about it. I must do planning for Thankgiving and Advent and my installation--soon! And finish the thank-you notes for pledges. And all the other things on the to-do list. So I hope I get my energy back tomorrow!

And now I shall go to bed, and hope that another good night's sleep will help.

Whinefest: One of THOSE days

~Stayed up waaaay too late last night, and woke up today with a massive headache. Related? I think I'm starting to see a pattern.

~Taking a shower and adjusting my wonderful massaging showerhead, it somehow broke and water spewed out in every direction except where it was supposed to.

~Took out a sweater I hadn't worn in a while and put it on, only to discover moth holes in several conspicuous places. Seems like mildew wasn't the only thing lurking in my closets at the last house.

~Shaking the salad dressing for lunch, top comes undone, dressing all over my shirt. At least it's just an old t-shirt.

~And to top it all off, walked in the kitchen a few minutes ago to see a MOUSE scurrying under the kitchen counter. Where it went I'm not sure, but I'm not happy about it!

~As Scarlett O'Hara would say, "Tomorrow is another day!"

Anatomy of a long day

~Sundays start early. The alarm goes off at 5:30, and although I hit the snooze button at least once, I need to get out of bed before 6:00. I try to head over to the church no later than 7:10, because I have to unlock, turn on all the lights (not as simple as it may sound--it requires making a round of church hitting various switches in different locations), print my sermon, check the altar set-up, check in with the lector and eucharistic minister, vest and be ready to go at 8:00.

~Two services: 8:0o and 10:00. I have an hour in between but I'm always busy, checking on one thing or another. Today the services were a little longer than usual--long announcements because I needed to explain the precautions I was implementing for communion for the flu season (however long it may last), and because since this is the Sunday before Veteran's Day we sang "American the Beautiful" at the offertory, and displayed the flag. I'm not a huge fan of patriotic displays in church (as I've said before) but this ritual is very meaningful to veterans, and that is more true in this parish than in my last, in part because of a second ritual that goes along with it. We have an active prayer shawl ministry and for Veteran's Day the women make MANY red, white and blue shawls and lap blankets that are sent to the area Veteran's hospital.

~After church I went to visit the son of a parishioner who is quite disabled by MS; he lives in a nursing home, and his family visits on Sunday for lunch, so I joined them. This man is younger than I am, and has been in the nursing home for 8 or 9 years already. Very hard thing for this family. Then I went to visit the 90-year-old retired priest who is a "priest associate" (not the same as associate rector, mind you) at my parish--where he retired from active ministry in--are you ready?--1982. He has been ordained longer than I've been alive, and until a few weeks ago he still participated in the liturgy every week. But a few weeks ago he fell and broke his hip, contracted pneumonia in the hospital, and is struggling with some swallowing issues (as in aspirating food into his lungs). He's in rehab and badly wanting to go "home" to his own assisted living apartment. And he's sharp as a tack at 90.

~Since I was already in the area, I stopped by Lowe's to look for a fireplace screen. This turned into an exerecise in futility--despite checking "local availability" before I went which indicated otherwise, they didn't have a screen I could use. Finding one that isn't gaudy and that will fit my fireplace is proving to be difficult.

~I thought I'd stop by Tarjay on the way home...no fireplace screen the right size there, either, but I still managed to drop $50 before I got out of there. That place is dangerous!

~Home about 5:45. And tired.

~For the first time I feel like I'm starting to "get" some of the geography in the area. I bought a GPS before I moved and it has been really, really helpful in getting around. I've been using the maps on my iPhone too, to look at where I'm going and I'm starting to see the "big picture" in terms of where certain roads end up, the best ways to get places, and so forth. Today when I left Lowe's and went to Tarjay, I had a huge "aha!" moment about how things were related. I know that sounds trivial, but it feels major to me.

~It was a gorgeous day today. Very cold yesterday, but almost 70 today. Too bad I spent the afternoon running around.

~Tomorrow is my day off--and I am very much looking forward to it! It goes by much too quickly these days!

Two pictures just for fun

I haven't posted any pictures in ages...I still haven't figured out the interface in my new version of Photoshop, so I just saved these to my desktop...a short-term solution to be sure!


The side of my house, as seen from my backyard, earlier this fall


Baby M, one week old (he's almost two months old now!)

Friday Five--What's new?

Please share five things you like *especially* when they are new.

1. Babies--they are so sweet and innocent, and well, "new." And the great thing is, they stay "new" with each new stage, each new developent. I'm loving seeing this again with my grandchildren.

2. Shoes--nothing like a brand new pair!

3. Books--especially one that is so inviting that you can't wait to sit down and devour it. New books are new universes waiting to be explored, with unsullied pages, and stiff new spines, and that new book smell. I hated buying used books as a student because they lacked all that new goodness.

4. New school supplies--clean crisp notebooks, pens and pencils sharp and ready to go. Even though I'm done with school, and even though I do most of my writing on the computer, I still love to get new pens and paper.

5. A newly made bed---not technically "new" I guess, but I love getting to bed with fresh clean sheets.

*and the book cover--I remember buying that book when I was pregnant with WW....long time ago!

Can we make a difference?

~Fish update: The second half of this interview on Fresh Air surprised me. When asked what he would suggest eating to slow down the demise of our fish population, the fish expert said what he ate (wild salmon) and went on to add that he didn't think what fish we chose to eat would have an impact on fishing practices--they are not consumer driven.

~So that leads me to ask, do individual actions ever matter? Can we slow down global warming by choosing to drive a more efficient car or using public transportation? Does it matter if we try to eat ethically or to recycle? Or are our actions futile unless the larger structures of the world change as well?

~What do you think?

I've been thinking

about yesterday's elections and what I wrote below, and it seems to me that the outcome of the elections is perhaps less a referendum on Obama's presidency and more a reflection of the narrow-mindedness of the electorate. I mean it's one thing to elect a Republican, and it's another thing entirely to elect someone who in his master's thesis argued that women should stay home and support their husbands, and that decried "feminists, fornicators, and homosexuals." Even if that person says that no longer reflects his views--not so sure I'd trust that.

Then there are the voters in Maine who voted for bigotry. Sorry, but that's what it is. I've said it before, but civil rights (and marriage is one) should not be put to the vote.

And that's my somewhat negative opinion for the day.

I might have to give up two of my favorite things*

Fish and diet coke. Diet Lime Coke to be specific, which I drink every day. Several glasses.

I've heard lots of reasons why diet soda is bad for you, but I've never really bought them. The rumors, for example, that aspartame causes brain tumors never seemed to be substantiated with real data, and the notion that drinking diet drinks causes one to eat more sugary food, even if it is generally true, I don't think applies to me. But today I found this report on a study that indicates that diet soda consumption may be related to decreased kidney function. After reading the actual abstract (available at npr.org) this may be the one I take seriously. At this point it's a correlation, and I know that it may not be causative, but do I want to run that risk? Nah. And I guess I shouldn't put Equal/aspartame in my coffee or tea either, if that is the suspected culprit. Maybe Splenda is still okay? Big sigh. Of course sugar always tastes better, but that is 'bad' too.

And the fish: I like fish, and ever since I gave up meat I've relied on eating fish once or twice a week; it's my protein of choice when I eat out. But according to this interview on Fresh Air yesterday, if I heard correctly, we have already depleted 90% of the world's fish. 90%. That is mind boggling. The expert interviewed talks about how fish that no one would or could have marketed before are being renamed, and processed so that they aren't so ugly so that we will eat them (Chilean seabass, for example, used to be known as Patagonian toothfish). And orange roughy (formally known as slimefish--doesn't t THAT sound appetizing!) matures so slowly (becomes 'adult' at 30 and may live to 150) that harvesting them is like cutting old growth forests. I had NO idea things were as bad as this sounds. So is it ethical to eat fish anymore? Farmed fish don't seem to be such a healthy alternative at this point either. I must catch the second half of this interview today and see with the fish expert recommends.

I suppose I am going to have to make myself drink plain old water (which for some reason I don't enjoy that much). And become a true vegetarian. Sigh. Giving up meat was easy; fish will be MUCH harder.

*and yes, I know this is a very "first world" kind of complaint...

it's that time again

~This morning I lay in bed listening to the news on NPR before I got up--they were talking about the elections taking place in several states tomorrow, and it set me to thinking about this time last year, and how excited many of us were about the presidential election. I can still feel that sense of excitement and hope that we felt in the hours leading up to Obama's election, and the elation we felt in the days that followed. And now the news media is referring to tomorrow's elections as a referendum on his presidency. That seems unfair somehow.

I knew from the get-go that Barack Obama wouldn't be able to accomplish all that I would hope for--no one could in this political climate. And I can't imagine a worse time to become president, what with wars in Afghanistan and Iraq dragging on and the economy going to hell in a handbasket in the waning days of the campaign. The health care debacle--I knew that there would be opposition, but nothing like what has sprung up from the conservatives--beyond the pale in many ways. Yes, I am very disappointed that health care reform is not more extensive than the bills currently in the congress (but not surprised--me, I'll take a single payor system, whether run by the government or not, but I don't expect it to happen any time soon).

Nonetheless, it seems unfair to say that if Democrats lose the governorship in New Jersey or Virginia, it's a reflection on how Obama is doing. Doesn't it have more to do with the merit of those candidates and the issues those states have to face than with national political sentiment? And shouldn't we give Obama more time before we sit judgment on his presidency? Take into consideration the extraordinarily difficult times he's been working in?

Next year is soon enough, don't you think?

Happy Birthday, NSLS

~How quickly another year passes. NSLS hasn't been blogging but she may still be lurking. Happy birthday, baby girl. Hope you had a great day, and hope it's a great year.

Hallowe'en redux

The extent of my costume this year

Random bits of Hallowe'en

~I'm happy to say that I did have a few trick-or-treaters....I only answered the door 3-4 times but there were multiple kids each time. And awfully cute costumes. Very young kids, too.

~There may have been more but it started raining again about 8, and that was that.

~I have a lot of candy left. Maybe I should've bought candy I don't like? But what fun is that?

~It's all chocolate :)

~I'm looking forward to an extra hour of sleep tonight, too. I'm really grateful, because tomorrow will be a very busy day. Two services, then run to Staples to get some supplies, then back home to set up for our All Saints' Dinner and Saints' Hall of Fame tomorrow evening. I'm a little nervous about that because even with a sign-up sheet I don't know what turnout will really be like, and how willing people will be to participate in the activity.

~I'm annoyed at having to go to Staples tomorrow. I should've gone today, but my local Stop & Shop has a Staples section that did (last week) have what I need (large pads of paper) so I thought I would get it there since it's 2 minutes from my house. Only when I went, that aisle has been redone to allow for--are you ready--toys for Christmas. Why do they need to sell toys for Christmas in the grocery store? Now? Gah. And at that point I didn't have time to go to Staples before time for trick-or-treaters.

~Oh, my petty complaints!

~My awesome Hallowe'en discovery? Dark chocolate Twix. YUM!

I closed the door

on the puppy question this week.

When I last reported on this, I was still in limbo, wanting to go get the puppy, but worried about having the time to properly attend to her. And shortly thereafter the puppy's mom emailed me to say that she'd decided to keep the puppy after all. I had suspected that might happen and when it did, it felt like a relief.

So I was surprised when the puppy's mom emailed me this week and asked me to call her. When I did she said she'd had another change of heart--did I still want the puppy?

And you know, I could say that honestly, I just couldn't do it right now. Part of it was seeing her going back and forth--she has an older dog she adores, and she wanted the puppy as company for herself and the dog, but found she just didn't want the commitment of time and energy a puppy required. If she (who doesn't work outside her home) couldn't pull it off, how would I? And part of it was realizing (again) when WW was here and we went out for the day, how I probably wouldn't have been able to do that if I had the puppy.

So I've close the door on not just this puppy, but any puppy for the foreseeable future. This puppy was a breed I really liked, and she was coming to me free of cost. If I turned that down, it must mean that now is just not the time for a dog.

For me to have a dog now would require me having a pet sitter who could come anytime of day, any day I needed. And that just isn't likely to happen. Maybe I'm selfish, but I am enjoying not being accountable to anyone for my coming and going. Not that I go that many places, but I CAN, if I want to, just pick up and go.

I'm still thinking about a cat though.

So I did it

~I just signed up for NaBloPoMo for the third year. The first year I really wasn't sure I could do it, but I did; the second I was coming up on the end of a year of posting every day. This year feels more challenging than the first--I haven't been blogging much, and honestly, the blogisphere is pretty quiet these days, compared to two years ago, at least the corner where I hang out. But I am going to try to write SOMETHING every day, or post a picture, and hopefully not be dreadfully boring.

~Speaking of pictures, after my hard drive crashed in April, I upgraded my Photoshop, and ever since then I have not been able to get the interface between iPhoto and Photoshop to work correctly--at least as I understand it. It used to be that I downloaded my pictures into iPhoto and then easily opened them to edit in Photoshop. And they were easily accessible in my photo library. Now, if I download them into iPhoto, I can't open them in Photoshop, and if I download them into Bridge (which photoshop really wants me to do) I can't seem to access them outside of Photoshop. Making me nuts, and it's a major disincentive to working with my photography.

Good morning!

~It's a bright sunny Monday morning, and I woke up feeling rested, despite once again staying up too late last night (although part of that 'staying up' was actually sleeping on the couch.) And it's my day off. Sweet. Especially since last week was busy and this week promises to be more so. Fewer meetings but lots of planning and things to get set in place.

~WW, Mr. WW and Baby M spent a week here with me, which I greatly enjoyed. Baby M is, of course, adorable, and I had a chance to get to know Mr. WW (who needs a better pseudonym) a little better--after all, I'd only known him through FB until he arrived in this country a mere 48 hours before Baby M was born. WW has been seriously lacking sleep, but they all seemed to sleep fairly well here, and I could do some baby holding, so all was good.

~While they were here we spent an afternoon in nearby Ivy League City, which I had thus far only driven through. Found a couple of nice coffee shop/bookstores, walked through the university, and enjoyed the sunshine. Will be back. The next day they took the train into the city and went to the Museum of Natural History, which thrilled Mr. WW.

~Saturday I attended our diocesan convention where a new bishop for our diocese was elected. Sadly to me I didn't get to vote, not having met the three-month residency requirement, but it was fun to observe. Election came on the second ballot which to me indicates a high degree of consensus--some episcopal elections go 15+ ballots before someone gets the required number of votes.

~Have I said here that I live in a very cool house? I'm really liking it (and I promise to post pix as soon as I figure out my new (six months ago) photoshop. Sigh. ) I don't have enough furniture for this house, and as it happens there a number of antique shops in my new town, right on the main street. So I've been perusing them for things I might use here. Truth is I can't afford really expensive antiques, but I like funky old things of the less expensive sort, and I bought a very cool old oak hall tree a couple of weeks ago. I have my eye on a couple of other things--this will be a work in progress.

~Can this really be the very last week in October? I am hoping for trick-or-treaters this year, and yes, I will give them candy. (I'm all for healthy living, but come on, it's Hallowe'en!) We never had any trick-or-treaters at our last house because it was down a long dark driveway, and not in a heavily residential neighborhood, but it should be different here. I love Hallowe'en.

~And if November is coming, will NaBloPoMo be coming too? Perhaps that's what it will take to reestablish a new blogging habit. If I can do it.

Almost missed it

It just occurred to me, as I was going down my blogroll, that today is my fourth blogiversary. How time flies!

After not missing a day for 400 and some days, (EVERY day in 2008 plus some this year) my writing has dribbled off to nothing. I keep saying I'm coming back, with no results so far. But as much as I've come to love FB, I hate to let the blog go. There are so many of you I wouldn't know at all if it weren't for our interactions in the blogisphere. My life is richer for "knowing" all of you, and in the really rough part of the last year or so, your support meant a great deal to me.

Raising a glass of virtual bubbly to all of you (or at least anyone who still stops by). Here's to another year!

Friday Five--Shoes, shoes, shoes

A topic near and dear to my heart...

1. What is your favorite footwear at this time in your life?

Danskos, Keenes, Ecco, Chakos. I'm all about comfort but with at least a modicum of style. I learned in the city that as my feet go, so goes my day, so I just won't scrimp on shoes (although I've never succumbed to teh Mephistos).

2. What was the craziest shoe, boot, or sandal you ever wore?.
2hat was the craziest shoe, boot, or sandal you ever wor
Probably the sandals with the 1 1/4 inch platforms and 2 1/2 inch heels I wore back in the seventies--and walked to work in. Yikes. Don't know how I did that.

3. What kind of shoes did you wear in your childhood?

Flip flops and Keds or Red Ball Jets in the summer, patent leather Mary Janes for Sunday, and I don't remember what but they were probably ugly for school. I only recall the saddle oxfords I had in about second grade because I remember wanting them intensely and being so happy when my mother agreed to them.

In high school Bass Weejuns were all the rage, and I was allowed to have them but it was a BIG DEAL.

4. How do you feel most comfortable? Barefoot, flip-flops, boots, or what?

I would wear sandals all year round if I could. But since I live in New England that really isn't an option. So, sandals when it's warm and some sort of Danskos or the like when it's not, and my furry Ugg slippers when I get home from work. Sadly my barefoot days seem to be over.

5. What kind of socks do you like, if any?

I wear black trouser socks when I wear pants to work, and I like ones with cool patterns--my favorites have a lacy pattern.

Bonus: Anything you want to share about feet or footwear.

When I was a kid I loved to go barefoot, and there was a summer when I didn't put shoes on from the day school was out until the day school started, not for any reason. But when I was in grad school I had to walk great distances across campus every day, wearing my Sam and Libby ballet flats and I wrecked my feet --painful bone spurs were the end result. Ever since then my feet have not been happy about me walking around barefoot.

On living alone...so far...

~I've been here just a little over a month and the Kid's been away at college for almost a month, and I'm trying to settle into a normal routine...just don't know what normal is, yet. Everything is different--my daily routine, my day off, my work routine. Until last week I still felt like I was in transit because everywhere I looked there was evidence of moving. But that's gone now--well, mostly. There are a few things that still need attention, but it looks like I live here now. So I don't have that pressure.

~I'm doing okay here alone. Being really busy helps, no doubt. The first few days the Kid was gone, his absence was palpable (as it was when each of the other kids left home but probably exaggerated this time since he's the last to go). But you become accustomed to it. I still walk by his unnaturally neat room and wish he were there, and I had a little pang last night when I was doing my pathetic grocery shopping for one (more on that). And I miss his music. I don't tend to turn music on (I don't mind quiet and I just don't think about turning on the iPod or stereo) but the Kid would play music, or even better, play his guitar and sing, and I'm surprised at how much I miss that. Overall, though, I'm fine, and as predicted, in some ways it's very easy to be on my own, and really, accountable to no one.

~I would like to settle into a better daily rhythm. Because the office staff works from 9-1 each day, I've adopted those hours plus. So I've been coming home for lunch 1:30-2:00ish, and then either working at home or going back to church for a few hours. And then not getting around to thinking about dinner until 7-8, by which time it feels too late to really cook anything. And I've been staying up way too late has had become my habit. Yesterday after a long week I realized how very exhausted I felt, and how much I need to make sure I get enough sleep every night. So I need to go to be earlier. Sounds simple, but I rarely make it to bed before midnight and it's often 1 am. Must work on that.

~Cooking and eating: Gah. Now I love to eat, but I lost my motivation to cook a few years back. And cooking for one? Seems like a lot of trouble. So I eat a lot of frozen dinners--Lean Cuisine and the like, supplemented with some extra veggies. And easy things like omelets, nachos, baked potatoes, veggie burgers. But real cooking has gone by the wayside for now. I had visions of cooking on the weekends and freezing single servings--sounds like a great idea, doesn't it? But I'm not sure I'll ever do it. If I were in the city, or even in City by the Lake I'd be eating lots of take out, but I haven't discovered that many options that are really close by yet, which may be just as well. And the Kid and I ate out fairly often, but I'm not (yet) motivated to eat out alone.

~As for my work routine: On the one hand it's really easy because I can set my own hours to a degree, and yet at the same time, it's challenging to use my time well. The whole coming home for a late lunch and then getting back to work is okay some days, but others I feel like I'm not being very productive after I come home for lunch. Part of it is working out what exactly my day to day tasks are, and that is becoming more clear as time goes by. And part of it is, as my clergy coach says, working smart.

~Managing my time off is a challenge, too. In my last position I had Mondays and Fridays off. Saturdays were considered work days, but in truth, every other week when I wasn't preaching, Saturday also could be a day off. I knew then I had it good. Ironically, I was criticized by my boss for working too much because I sometimes worked on one of my days off (and very occasionally on both of them). Now I have Monday off, and I suppose theoretically Saturday, except I still write sermons on Saturday and this month I have lots of Saturday meetings as well. And last week I had a funeral on Monday, so no day off at all (but how do you say no to a family scheduling a funeral for a loved one?) So my off time is drastically reduced. I've been encouraged to take comp time, and I guess I could do that by taking some afternoons. off I just don't want that to make me look like I'm a slacker. It's all a balancing act, I guess.

~The whole should-I-get-a-dog question remains in limbo. When I left my previous location, the option was still open for me to claim the puppy, but I haven't had time to go get her. And as time goes by, I wonder if I could do the day-to-day? I have days when I need to be gone all day (tomorrow for instance is Clergy Day) and while I've had offers for pet care, I'm not sure any of them would be able to do mid-day on week days kind of care. Part of me still wants the dog--and I'd like to train her as a therapy dog--but part of me still says are-you-craaazzy??? And the latter part seems to be ahead right now. Maybe a cat instead?

~ETA: I actually did cook a from-scratch dinner tonight: corn on the cob and sauteed veggies (onion, zucchini, yellow squash and green tomato--yummy!) Of course the Kid (were he here) would say, "That's not a meal, that's sides" but it works for me.

October

HOLY COW--HOW can it be OCTOBER already? Where has the time gone?

Honestly, the last few months seem like such a blur--packing, the relentless packing, then reversing the process, and all while first saying goodbye and processing everything I'd been through, and then while starting a new job. I don't want to do that again for a long time! I am happy to say that after I stayed up very late night before last hanging pictures, now the "moving in" is just about complete. It looks like I'm here to stay, and it looks like home.

And I'm SO happy to be here. Really. I love my job, and so far I like the area. I have STARBUCKS and a FARMER'S MARKET both less than a mile from my house (and if you've read here for long you will appreciate how very happy that makes me). I can drive 10-20 minutes and get to anything and everything I could possibly want in terms of shopping (Ikea, Target, Whole Foods--well in a couple of months, WF). I can take the train into the city. I live in an awesome house, and I have wonderful people to work with.

I know this honeymoon won't last forever, and that little superstitious part of me is almost afraid to be too happy for fear of what might go wrong, but really, right now life is good!

Friday Five~It's Fall!

1. Share a Fall memory.

Walking through big piles of crisp golden leaves on the way to school when I was in 1st or 2nd grade.

2. Your favorite Fall clothes--(past or present)?

I love it when it's time to start wearing sweaters again.

3. Share a campfire story, song, experience...etc.

Sitting around the campfire making s'mores on the shore of Lake Champlain at camp.

4. What is your favorite thing about this time of year?

Fall is my favorite season--I love the changing of the leaves, the cooler temps, the preparations for winter.

5. What changes are you anticipating in your life, your church, family...whatever...as the season changes and winter approaches?

No more changes, please! After packing, moving, unpacking, starting the new job, taking the Kid off to college and having a new grandson, I'm hoping for some relative calm here.

Right on time!

~WW gave birth to my grandson, Baby M, yesterday at 3:21 pm, exactly on her due date. 7 lbs 6 oz, lots of black hair, and beautiful. Pictures to follow.

It's been a whirlwind for her since Mr. WW just arrived from Nepal on Sunday afternoon. They are all exhausted.

As for me, I was supposed to be at a new clergy meeting yesterday, but I begged off. As in introducing myself to the bishop, and then saying, "My daughter is labor, and I really need to leave." He was very understanding, for which I am very grateful.

Catching up, random bits style

~Catching up seems to be the theme of my life. I'm still unpacking, but the end is in sight. I'm off today and plan on a tackling those pesky remaining boxes--but it's the last ones that are the hardest, with all the stuff you look at and say "What am I going to do with THAT?" Which probably means that some of it should just go straight to the trash. Even though I tried to throw away lots as I packed. Ugh. Moving is a pain.

~I took the Kid to college last Sunday. That really deserves its own post, but I don't know if I'll get around to writing it. Suffice it to say that my nest is completely empty, and leaving him there was a bit hard. Tears were shed on the drive home, but I'm adapting and he seems happy at school so far. But when I think about it, I realize it is a huge milestone. I've been parenting for more than 30 years, and not to have a child at home now is, well, different. More about that as time goes by, I'm sure.

~I started work officially on September 1, but yesterday was my first Sunday. It really was a wonderful day. Lots of people in church (including my clergy coach and his wife!) and by all reports people who hadn't been there for a while. I'm sure there is lots of curiosity about the new priest, especially the new WOMAN priest (yes, there is some of that, but it's okay I think) but our task now is to keep them coming back. We'll see. There is so far a very positive feel in this place, and I'm so so happy to be here.

~In other good news, WW's beloved (whom I mentioned briefly here) finally arrived in Vermont yesterday--just in the nick of time since their baby is due on Tuesday--tomorrow actually!! Let us just say that the wheels of immigration move very, very, very slowly. I'm so glad he's here!

~As I was reading blogs last night I realized how many of the bloggers I feel like I've come to know over the last four years now either write infrequently or not at all. Nothing is forever, I guess, but I miss some voices. And I'm grateful for FB where I keep up with some folks I first met here. I haven't joined the twitter fray yet, but I guess the time is coming for that....

~I am also grateful for FB--as well as texting and Skype and other electronic media--for making it so much easier to keep up with my kids. Wherever they are! It's a whole new world compared to when my older kids went off to college and we had to rely on--gasp--land lines!! Only we didn't call them that...it was just the phone. And having grown up in a household where long distance calls were a BIG DEAL, I wasn't that good at calling frequently, as my daughters will attest. Electronic media make it so much better.

~Now I must go unpack SOMETHING before the day gets away from me!

We're here!

Actually we've been here a few days--in our new location, that is. Guess it needs a pseudonym. Suffice it to say for now that it's in another New England state.

Packing up was crazy, as I knew it would be. Despite all my best efforts we were up half the night before the packers came finishing up. The movers were great, though, and loaded and unloaded with efficiency and good humor. Even the guys who had to trek up to the attic in my new house multiple times. Turns out the mover needed two trucks--not because I had too much stuff, but because I have so many books that it would've been too heavy for one truck! Go figure. One of the movers carrying in book boxes said "There sure is a whole lot of reading going on in this house!"

My new house is awesome. It's an old Victorian, and it's been well care for. The Kid quickly noted that we have a "cupboard under the stairs" and he claimed for his bedroom the room accessible directly by the back stairs. My only complaint is that I don't have enough storage space in the kitchen. The butler's pantry in my old house along with ample kitchen cabinets really spoiled me. And I don't really have enough furniture, but that is something to take care of over time.

So unpacking has gone slowly so far, but I need to pick up the pace because I actually start work on Tuesday. Not sure that reality has set in yet! I am excited and nervous and happy and scared, but I think that this is going to be a good place. They already gave us a warm welcome--and a delicious dinner--when we arrived Thursday evening.

If you've read here for long, you know that the last year and a half or so has been really difficult, but in the end it's all worked out. I left my previous position knowing that the work I'd done had been appreciated by the congregation, and knowing that I had built good relationships with parishioners, if not with my boss. And now I have a wonderful new position with lots of potential--lots of challenges to be sure, but lots of potential. I am so blessed to be here.

As I was packing I had lots of posts running through my head, triggered by things I found along the way, and things I chose to throw away (including my tenure file, my old syllabi, and most of my teaching materials.) Hopefully, some of those posts will actually get written.

But first I have more unpacking to do!

Random bits of PACKING!

~Five days before the movers come and I'm deep in the throes of packing--I think I've reaching that "it's all chaos" stage. It has to get better, right?

~The books are 99.5% packed and I even managed to give four big bags full to the library. Nonetheless I foresee a shortage of bookcases in my future since there are fewer built-ins both in my church office and in my new rectory.

~As I predicted, it's hotter than h*ll and the humidity is about 99%. Why do I always move in the summer?

~Because it's so hot (and because I hate packing) I stop every so often and go shopping for one more thing for the Kid to take to college. And every trip I say, "We're done now, right?" Remains to be seen if we're really done.

~I'm trying to weed through things that have accumulated, or worse, were moved before (sometimes more than once) when they shouldn't have been. Which slows the process because I take so many side trips down memory lane. But since it's so hot, sometimes that's okay.

~And I've spent a prodigious amount of time on FB--especially playing FarmVille which has to be the biggest.time.suck.ever but I keep right on playing. I guess I need some diversion.

~Remember the puppy? Well, after failing to make ANY decision when the offer was first made, I thought the deal was off. But this week the puppy and her current mom came to visit, and we may have worked a deal where I come get the puppy after I'm safely moved. I'm kind of excited about that.

~I'm getting excited about getting to my new church, too. And nervous. And scared. And happy. Really, I'm looking forward to it, but sometimes I don't think that the reality has set in. I'm going to be the rector!

~Stay tuned. I've vowed to write more and give the blog a new look once I get settled.

Celebrity sightings

~~but not by me....

I live in a relatively quiet place. It is a vacation destination, but people who vacation here tend to keep a pretty low profile and most celebs are pretty secluded. But a Very Prominent Family happens to live here as well, and today there is a funeral for a Very Important Person. So there are lots more celebrities around than usual. Among the Kid's friends there have been a LOT of celebrity sightings, including the governor of a bankrupt state, the world's richest TV host, a legendary blind singer, and the VPOTUS. Wow. I'm a bit envious, I must admit.

O the irony!

For as long as I've lived here I've lamented the lack of availability of locally grown produce in the summer. Yes, there is a farmer's market, but it takes place on a day of the week when it was absolutely impossible to get there because of work. Farms stands are few and far between, and until this year, CSAs were pretty rare, too.

Today the Kid and I went to Whole Foods--it's almost a hour's drive away, so we don't go there very often, but the Apple Store is there also and we went to get the Kid a new laptop to take to college (!) and since we were there anyway, I couldn't skip Whole Foods.

One of the things I like about WF is that they tell you where the produce comes from. I really appreciate that. I was eyeing tomatoes from Jersey and peaches grown in this state, and blueberries from Maine and Michigan, when to my great surprise I spied cabbages and potatoes from--yes, you guessed it--the very town I live in. Who knew?

It's sort of like living in Florida and only finding California oranges in the grocery store! Why can't there be more places selling locally grown produce RIGHT HERE?

Argh.

Sorting and filing

In some ways I'm a very organized person. But my organization tends to be internal, and the outside--well, chaos might be too strong, but there tends to be a bit of clutter, especially when it comes to things that need to be sorted and filed. I've tried to be better about it, but still--I just hate dealing with it.

A small metal filing cabinet has moved around with me for the past 20+ years, holding bits of this and that. Every so often I'll take a stab at getting files in order, but it's hit or miss. And since we've lived here, I've filed papers on a shelf instead. Finally last night I decided the filing cabinet--rusty, dented, and not very attractive--had to go, so I unloaded its contents and started going through them.

Of course, it was like opening Pandora's box. Yes, there were tax forms--many years worth, all neatly filed away. And there were birth certificates and shot records and report cards from years gone by. A random paper I wrote my freshman year in college--on Southern food. (Don't ask why--I don't remember.)

Then there were the warranties for things I no longer own, the floppy disks that no computer can read anymore, old canceled checks, Mother's Day, graduation and birthday cards, a newspaper article about me when I graduated from college, random photos (the big box of photos is still upstairs, needing to be repacked!), receipts for who knows what--the flotsam and jetsam of my life.

Some of it was funny; some of it was painful--the divorce decree, the letter my dad wrote to each of us when he knew his cancer was terminal--which I ironically received the same day as my acceptance letter from seminary. An essay I wrote for the commission for ministry and my first ember letter to my bishop, along with his reply were tucked away, too.

I filled a big box with discards, shredded two big bags of papers, and reduced it all down to one neat waterproof file box. It's all in folders, but it wouldn't win any gold stars for great organization. And I don't think I ever will. Because here's the thing: Being able to file everything away into orderly folders, neatly labeled doesn't really match how my life is. It doesn't encompass the ambiguity, the ups and downs, the messy reality of my life. I expect my files, like my life, will always be a bit chaotic. But that's okay.

Random bits of "I'm on vacation now!"

~Even though I have tons of organizing and packing to do, I'm determined to have some vacation time. So yesterday morning I loaded up the car and took off for Vermont where I'll be on child care duty for a few days with the delightful Baby J who has grown so much since I saw her the first week of June that I can hardly believe it.

~Traffic was teh awful yesterday. Where I live, I expect delays at certain points, but oddly, the back-ups were in totally different places yesterday. But they were bad enough that my trip took a whole hour longer than it should have.

~Today I spent with WW, looking at car seats and seeing her new apartment and then attending the shower NSLS threw for her. Boy, are car seats more complicated (and expensive) than they were when the Kid was an infant.

~Alas, I did not leave rainy weather behind. There were torrential downpours off and on all afternoon. Really, all of New England is just going to float away...

~Three of NSLS's high school friends were at the shower this afternoon. They're all married or engaged, two of the four (counting NSLS) are moms, one is a mom of two. But in my mind I still see the giggling ninth graders I used to drive around, the cheerleaders and track runners I watched compete, the girls I saw off to the prom. Where has the time gone?

~The Kid stayed behind for a few days to work and spend time with his friends. Weird going off without him, but preparation for the weeks ahead when he will be going off on his own to college. He's taking the bus up to join me on Thursdsay, and next weekend we'll head off to Maine for a few days.

~ I have pictures to post, but ever since I got a newer version of Photoshop and Leopard I've been having trouble with pictures. I'm not sure exactly what is different, but I need to figure it out. Maybe while Baby J is napping this week...

~And now I should go to bed at a decent hour and store up som energy for baby-watching

All over but the packing

Hard for me to believe, still, but Sunday was my last day at work. It was a fantastic day--with the best going away party ever. I was truly moved by the out pouring of love and good wishes from the congregation. And the presents, and the cards, and the flowers and the food. Totally amazing day that I will never, ever forget. Huge crowd. Lots of tears, too.

So I've spent much of this week packing up my office. It's all done now except for cleaning up my computer--copying all the files I want to keep and then wiping the hard drive. That may have to wait until vacation is over.

And gah--I haven't even BEGUN to pack the house yet. Saturday I'm going north to visit and take care of Baby J since her daycare provider is on vacation. Then we'll be off to Maine for a few days and after that it will be PACK, PACK, PACK. Ugh.

As for the puppy, I still haven't decided. One day I think it's a great idea, and the next I think it's insane. But I must decide soon,

Discerning my call to a puppy*

I've said quite flippantly lately that when the Kid leaves for college I might just have to get a dog. But there is an underlying seriousness in that comment; I've never lived alone, and I think I will miss some sort of companionship at home. I like dogs and I've thought on and off for a couple of years that I should get one--probably I should have done it the first year I was here when I had time to train it and the Kid might have been interested in having a pet again. But I didn't.

Somewhat out of the blue last week, the opportunity to acquire a puppy just fell into my lap. And not just any puppy, a golden doodle puppy--this one to be specific:


Isn't she cute?

As it happens, if I were looking for a dog, a golden doodle is exactly what I'd want--low to no shedding, good temperament, good with kids, smart, gentle. Just what I'd want.

BUT

The timing couldn't be worse. I have to pack and move house and start a new job and get a kid off to college. How would I have time to deal with a puppy? Yikes.

But she's so cute.

And then there's my vacation plans. I can't adopt a puppy and go off and leave her. And I don't see how I can take her with us either, for several reasons. So unless her current owner would wait until I get home, that's a problem.

But the biggest issue is this: Am I REALLY ready for this kind of commitment? For the first time in my adult life I won't have to be responsible for another person. So do I want to tie myself down with a puppy?

But she's so cute...

And I'm torn. On Friday and Saturday I was sure I would take her. But yesterday and today I'm leaning more in the direction of saying no, and at the same time thinking I'll regret it later if I do.

Argh.

Opinions, of course, are welcome.


*for you non-clergy types, a tongue-in-cheek reference to the discernment process clergy must engage in prior to ordination, e.g., "I'm discerning my call to the priesthood"

Back to our regularly scheduled prgramming

It's crazy how I blogged for more than 400 days without missing and then just STOPPED. I didn't mean to stop, but honestly, I got tired of hearing myself complain. Or thinking about complaining. And I've come to realize that there is a fine line between venting (important for mental health) and complaining incessantly (bad for mental health--for mine at least). And there were a few weeks there when I felt just too worn down to think of anything to say. But I didn't intend to quit writing. Over the last few weeks, I've composed many posts in my head--they just haven't made it out of my head...but I'm here to say that I intend to start writing again.

I can't quite believe we're moving into the end of July. Summer was slow--very slow--coming to this part of the world this year, and it's only in the last couple of weeks that it's felt like summer. And suddenly I have one week left at work, and a month before moving and just a bit longer than that before the Kid goes off to college. Yikes.

I'm so happy to be out of the limbo I was in for a while of not knowing where I was going to end up, or if I was going to have a job, but I still feel like I have an awful lot of balls in the air. When i stop and think about getting everything ready to move--and all the packing--I feel a bit overwhelmed. One day at a time, though, it will get done. I hope.

I've been saying good bye at church for a few weeks now..but that's a subject for another post. Next Sunday will be my last day, and how I feel about that is probably subject for another post as well. As is the puppy I'm thinking about getting. Hey, at least I have things to write about!

Random bits of catching up...

~I haven't blogged in 4evah! Or so it seems. It's not that I haven't had things to say; I just haven't had the energy to say them. BUT

~(As many of you know from FB) the good news is that I have a new position starting September 1 and I am VERY excited. I have accepted a call to become the rector of a parish in a nearby New England state--must come up with a pseudonym for this parish soon. My last Sunday here is July 26 and I am taking my vacation in August. Much of which will be spent packing, packing, packing.

~And did I mention that this new parish has a sweet rectory? Big old Victorian, wood floor, fireplace. Awesome.

~The Kid is all graduated and hanging out for the summer. The only downside is that the weather is so crappy he's not getting to work much. He works at a seasonal restaurant and if business isn't good, they don't need as much help. And the weather is teh sucky.

~Seriously, the weather is teh sucky in the extreme. It rains almost everyday. And it is cold. I read other peoples' FB statuses about being hot and needing a/c, and I can hardly believe it. I've had the heat on here twice in the last week. Yesterday's high was 59 and today wasn't much warmer. What happened to summer?

~So what's new with you?

Friday Five~Grocery shoppong

This week's Friday Five is all about food shopping.

1. Grocery shopping--love it or hate it?

Hate it. But honestly, it's not the shopping per se; it's the whole meal planning thing. I've just lost the knack, I think. Cooking real meals has been very hit or miss around here for a while.

2. Who is the primary food shopper in your household?

Me. There is no one else to do it.

3. Do you have a beloved store like Trader Joe's which is unique to your location or family?

We have a TJ's and two conventional chain groceries. And that's about it. I have to say that I'm not nearly as excited about TJ's as other people seem to be. Maybe it's because our TJ's is very small and probably doesn't have quite the selection that larger ones do. Or maybe it's just me and my general disdain for grocery shopping. I really wish we had Whole Foods. That's my favorite.

4. How about a farmer's market, or CSA share, as we move into summer? Or do you grow your own fruits/veggies/herbs?

My area is short on farmer's markets and the like. Just this year a new CSA has started up, but I didn't join b/c I wasn't sure if I'd be here all summer. I hope wherever I move will have more of both. One of the great features of the last two places I lived was the wonderful famers' markets and availability of good fresh produce, locally grown--yes, even NYC has wonderful greenmarkets.

5. What's the favorite thing you buy at the grocery store?

Diet Lime Coke; blueberries and kefir for my cereal; oj. I'm boring, what can I say?

Friday Frive~Moving and changing

Since I've never, ever lived on place longer than 8 years, and since I will be packing and moving (somewhere) before 2009 is over, this one is right up my alley!

1. A big move is looming, name one thing that you could not possibly part with, it must be packed ?

Furniture and such can always be replaced, but I have a few things that I am attached to--most of the things hanging on my walls have meaning to me, a trunk that reminds me of my grandmother, things that belonged to my dad and to my mother-in-law, family pix and the like must be packed with care.

2. Name one thing that you would gladly leave behind...

I've kept things pared down over the years, so I don't have too much. I did at one move leave all my old living room furniture behind, and was quite happy to do so, even though I didn't replace it for a whole year.

When I leave here, however, what I most want to leave behind is all the negativity that's clouded my life over the last year or so at work. I want to shake the dust off my feet and move on.

3. How do you prepare for a move

a. practically?

Packing, packing, packing. I've done this enough that I am good at it, and I like my stuff to organized when I unpack it, so I take some care about how things are boxed up. And I have LOTS of books to pack. At my next move, though, I hope to negotiate so that the movers will pack my china.

b. spiritually/ emotionally?

Saying goodbye is hard, but important, so I try to do that. And mentally prepare myself for a new place, thinking about what I have to look forward to.

4. What is the first thing you look for in a new place?

Grocery store, coffee shop, bookstore, hardware store.

5. Do you settle in easily, or does it take time for you to find your feet in a new location?

I have to unpack quickly and get the house in order--I can't stand living with unpacked boxes, and I'm a fast unpacker usually. How long it takes me to acclimate over all to a new place has varied. A couple of places I've felt at home right away, and a couple of places it's taken a year or more to feel like "home."

Friday 5 on Saturday: The big to-do

1) What home fix-it project is on your Big To-Do?

~Actually none. I live in church housing, and since I will be moving out sometime this year, the church has postponed any more projects on the rectory for now. (Last summer, if you recall, we had the great-new-floors-leads-to-new-plumbing job.)

2) What event (fun or work) is on your Big To-Do?

~Find a new position; pack and move. That pretty much says it all for now.

3) What trip is on your Big To-Do?

~My vacation plans are on hold (see #2 above) but it would be great if we could make it to Maine (although there are lots of what-if factors in that this year) like we've done the past few summers. I'd also love to spend some time in Vermont.

4) What do you wish was on someone ELSE's (partner, family member, celebrity, etc...) Big To-Do?

~Offer me a position?
~And the Kid must sort through all of his stuff as we prepare to both move and send him off to college.

5) Getting inspired? What may end this summer having moved from the Big To-Do to the Big Ta-da?

~Who knows? Everything seems to be up in the air at this point!

The times, they are a'changing

Way back in January I wrote that this would be a year of changes, and those changes are in full swing. The Kid took the big yellow school bus for the last time today, took his last exam, and finished his high school career. Tomorrow night is the Senior Prom, and a week from Saturday he officially graduates. I am feeling a bit dazed by it all, even though I've been thinking about it for months. It seems like just yesterday that we were going to kindergarten orientation, and he was talking about riding the bus for the first time.

This also marks the first time in something like 28 years that I won't have a child in public school. Does that make me officially old? It just feels weird. Of course, having my kids spread out over a 16 year period meant that I was parent to a school age kid for longer than most. But I have to say, it's hard to imagine not having a kid to get off to school in the morning, not buying school supplies in the fall, not doing all those school related things.

But that's not all the change, oh, no. In addition to the ones I expected, there's more: I'm going to be a grandmother again. NO, NSLS isn't pregnant again; it's WW. I've actually known this for several months, but between not posting much lately, and waiting to see if she'd blog about it, I haven't said anything about it. But now I will tell the story. It seems that last year when WW spent some time in Nepal before returning to the states she met someone. I don't know all the story but apparently their attachment grew and that is one of the reasons she went back to Nepal for the winter, where she fell in love and they decided to get married. Her quick trip home earlier this year was to do all the visa paperwork so that he could come to the states with her, which is no simple matter. And they are having a baby in September! If you know me on FB you probably know that WW returned to the states a couple of weeks ago, and hopefully her beloved (who needs a pseudonym) will join her by the end of the summer. Very exciting.

Meanwhile, I'm still in limbo, with only 2 months left in my current position. The job search is agonizingly slow, but I am hopeful that something will work out sooner rather than later.

True confessions

~Y'all know (at least if you 've read here for a while) that I haven't had a TV since...oh, 1996 or so. There are whole TV series that came and went and played a huge role in pop culture that I never saw, and really never minded not seeing.

~Two years ago now, the Kid borrowed the first season of Grey's Anatomy on dvd from a friend I was hooked. I bought the 2nd season when I found it on sale one day, and the 3rd season I got on iTunes. Then last year I discovered abc.com and it became my Friday routine to watch Grey's while I ate lunch--my day off treat.

~Every once in a while I would start watching something else, but nothing really caught my fancy unitl last fall and I watched an episode of Dancing with the Stars and loved it. It is a pure feel-good show for me--makes me smile. So it was added to my routine.

~One of the reasons I was glad not to have a TV is because it is soooooo addictive. I was pretty picky when I had a TV but I still watched too much. And over the last couple of months, as my stress levels have gone up, so has my TV watching--Grey's, DWTS, Castle, Private Practice, Brothers and Sisters. The last two are really cheesey and I can't believe I've been watching them, but there you go. Keeps my mind off other things.

~I've always been a sucker for a sappy love story--I remember in high school reading Love Story ("Love means never having to say you're sorry....") and crying so hard my mother came upstairs to see what was wrong. Grey's Anatomy has had that effect on my this season...I cry just about every episode, and never more than this week, which I watched twice tonight. What a dweeb I am!

~I'm still glad I don't have a TV....I guess I'd be a total junkie if I did.