Blogging in the New Year

~It's almost 9pm EST, and I just woke up from a short nap on the couch. Honestly, I've done nothing for the last five days but I'm still tired--maybe it's the cold that is still hanging on. But the party is open--as I promised, I've got artichoke dip here and some bubbly for the new year (virtual champagne, and some sparkling apple cider for the real thing). So join the party. What are you doing for the new year?

~I'm listening to NPR talk about the campaign in Iowa. John Edwards is actually gaining inthe polls and there is "no statistical difference" between Edwards, Clinton, and Obama. I think I could support Edwards. I would've preferred him to Kerry last time, and I do think he understands what "real life" is like. I like Obama, too.

~But reality is that GWB is still president for another year. That's a long time for him to mess things up more. And the Republican candidates scare me. All of them.

~Looking at my post from this time last year, I mentioned working on my knitting project that I had just cast on. Ahem. No progress on that front...

~It's 11:55 now....I've been importing CDs to my itunes, talked with friends in Maine, had some popcorn--Orville Redenbacher's Buttery Salt and Black Pepper--yum!

~HAPPY NEW YEAR everyone. May 2008 bring peace and happiness to us all.

The year in review

If it's the last day of the year, it must be time for the year in review. So here are the first lines from the first blog post of each month for 2007. (Despite dropping out of Project 365 fairly early, I did post a lot of pictures, and in several months my first post was a picture, but only once were there no words):

~January: We're in Maine visiting our friends D and J.

~February: But how many of you own this version? (Yes, I am truly a geek).

~March:
~April: Today is Good Friday.

~May: When my house and yard were being cleaned up before I moved in the slate patio was expanded without too much prep work (it needs to be fixed).

~June: From the RevGals, in the month of graduations and movings on...

1. Think back to the time you left High School, what were your hopes visions and dreams for your life/ for the world?

~July: The Kid and I left home yesterday morning and drove to northern VT to visit LD#2 (known to some of you as NSLS) for the Fourth of July holiday.

~August: Or tales of a neurotic shopper....

~September: From a late afternoon walk in the church garden...

~October: Last week went by in a fog, sort of.

~November: When I was in the fifth grade we spent a few weeks studying the United Nations.

~December: 30 posts in 30 days--actually 35 posts

I guess that pretty much sums up my year. 2007 was fairly uneventful (unlike 2006 during which I was ordained to the priesthood and NSLS got married, and 2008 during which I will become an 'amma' and Elder Son will be married). We had several lovely trips--to Maine, Vermont and New York City, which are my three favorite places. I worked hard, and on more of my days off than I like to count, but I felt like it mostly was good--my preaching is continuing to develop, I have more meaningful responsibility, I get to do things I like to do.

So how was your year?

For everyone who is a mom or ever had one

As seen at Julie's and too funny not to share:

On the fifth day of Christmas

~I woke up to driving rain and wind. It's slowed down a bit now, but it promises to be another dreary day.

~I've been fighting a cold since Wednesday and I'm not sure who's winning. It's not terrible, more like annoying, but I wish it would go away.

~I restarted (for the umpteenth time) knitting a scarf last night. Just when I felt like I was getting the feel of it I realized that somehow I was adding an extra stitch every few rows. How I was doing that I have NO idea. But I guess I will start over ONE MORE TIME today. Perhaps I am not meant to be a knitter...

~I am going to take the plunge and commit to Project 365 for 2008. This year I am going to set up a separate photoblog. Yankee T and perhaps Profgrrrrl are jumping into the fray as well.

~I am tempted to do the blog-every-day-for-a-year thing, but I haven't completely made up my mind yet. In a way 365 is doing that, but I'm thinking more particularly of blogging with words.

~Having no other plans (well, I had an invite to go out of town but it's not feasible this year) for New Year's Eve, I may throw a blog party....and you're all invited....I'll bring artichoke dip and champagne....anyone else?

ETA: Here's the link to the new photoblog--no pictures yet, just playing with the template.

What kind of art are you?

You Are Impressionism

You think the world is quite beautiful, especially if you look at it in new and interesting ways. You tend to focus on color and movement in art. For you, seeing the big picture is much more important than recording every little detail. You can find inspiration anywhere... especially from nature.

What Art Movement Are You?

Actually, this is perfect for me because I love the impressionists. Now if I'd turned out to be Jackson Pollock or some such, I'd be very disappointed!

On the third day of Christmas

it was a quiet day at chez Rev. Dr. Mom and I mostly putzed around.

~Loaded music on my new iPod (a very sweet blue nano)

~Cleaned up the rest of the boxes and bits of this and that in the living room and vacuumed

~Talked with friends on the phone

~Did some laundry

~Stayed in my jammies much of the day

~It was a grey, dismal day. It some ways it feels like Christmas is long past. Partly, I suppose, it's because everyone had to leave yesterday, and I was working much of the time they were here. But I am determined to make the most of my days off, including doing some reading and trying to knit again, and maybe going to the movies.

~I'm wondering whether I should try Project 365 again. I didn't get very far last year. I have a new camera, but that doesn't mean I'll find anything more interesting to take pictures of every day.

~And should I sign up to blog every.single.day?

On the second day of Christmas...

the house suddenly got much quieter. NSLS, Mr. LS, and Woman Warrior left this morning for Vermont. NSLS and Mr. LS both have to work tomorrow, and Woman Warrior is spending her last few days before she returns to Korea in Vermont visiting friends there.

We had a great Christmas. I was busy working much of the time, but there was much baking and cooking and present wrapping going on while I worked. Yesterday after I preached and celebrated at the Christmas Day service we had sweet potato pancakes for brunch, opened presents, relaxed for the afternoon, and then cooked dinner of ham, baked pineapple, mashed potatoes, sauteed green beans and salad.

The time we were together went by very quickly! Woman Warrior has been home a week already. The good news is that she will only be in Korea for two more months, and she plans to spend the summer in Vermont, so we will be able to see her more often. NSLS is looking very pregnant, and the baby is very active these days. She and Mr. LS are really excited about this baby and it's very cute.

I got a bit of money for Christmas, and I think that I shall use it on an iPod. I actually pulled off a Christmas surprise for the Kid (and for me, too) which deserves its own post in a bit.

I still have a few gifts to wrap and mail...hey, Christmas lasts until January 6!

In the wee hours of Christmas morning...

~Days til Christmas--14 4 0

~Sermons to write finish between now and Christmas morning--3 2 1

~Christmas Eve services--3 0

~Christmas Day services--1

~Stockings to stuff--5

~Days I have off after Christmas--6--YAY!

For all who celebrate it...

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Random bits of the Sunday before Christmas

~It totally doesn't feel like Sunday, despite the fact that I've preached at three services and attended Christmas pageant rehearsal and answered all the altar guild's questions about setting up for tomorrow's services..

~I preached on what the Christmas story is like if you only have the gospel according to Matthew (no trip to Bethlehem, no baby in a manger, no shepherds watching their flocks by night, and Joseph's story, not Mary's).

~After church we all went out for brunch. I really wanted a nap after that, but I ran errands instead.

~Mr. LS, NSLS, and Woman Warrior have taken over shopping, baking, and cooking. It's wonderful. We had salmon and risotto and roasted asparagus for dinner.

~I still have my Christmas Day sermon to write, and I am not inspired.

~It is pouring rain outside. I would prefer snow.

~Tonight we went through some boxes of old stuff I've moved around for years. I have old baby clothes--some from my infancy and that of my siblings, and some from my kids. And I have vintage Fisher Price, and WW's old dolls including two My Child dolls in really good condition. I should've taken some pictures while I had everything out of the closet.

~I still have Christmas things to do, but some of them will have to get done during the 12 days of Christmas.

~And tomorrow is Christmas Eve!

December by the numbers--update

~Days til Christmas--14 4

~Sermons to write between now and Christmas--3 2

~Advent programs left to do--2 0

~Other extra church-related pre-Christmas activities to attend--4 0

~Christmas Eve services--3

~Christmas Day services--1

~Bulletins to prepare for week of Christmas (including weekends before and after because they all must be done by Dec. 21)--10 0!

~Days til LD#1 comes home--9 0!

~Days til NSLS and Mr. LS arrive--12 tonight

~Menus planned--0 0--well maybe 1/2

~Presents bought--1 several

~Presents left to buy--many just a few

~Trees to buy, put up and decorate--1 tree's up, still needs to be decorated

~Days I have off after Christmas--6--YAY!

Pins and needles

~would probably describe my being today (and NSLS as well) because Woman Warrior (aka LD#1) is flying home today. I can't even get my mind around the time differences--what day it was when she left, how long it will take to get her. She is flying Seoul to Tokyo, Tokyo to Detroit, and Detroit to Boston. Or as she put it a taxi, two buses, three planes and a car ride. We haven't seen her since NSLS's wedding a year and a half ago.

~I still have WAY too much to do to get ready for Christmas. WAY too much. But what gets done, gets done I guess.

~And speaking of Christmas prep, I should get back to proof reading bulletins!

Lost Christmas tree

~The Kid and I went to buy a Christmas tree this afternoon. It was about 4:00, and the garden shop where we usually get our tree wasn't busy at all. We quickly picked out a nice tree and went inside to pay for it while the lot attendant took the tree to trim the bottom branches.

After looking at Christmas lights for a few minutes and paying for the tree, we headed back out to pick it up. The lot attendant (the same one who had helped us earlier) motioned us to pull up, took the receipt and went to get the tree. But he came back empty-handed. "Ill be right back," he said, and took off on his little cart. So we waited...and waited. After a few minutes he came back somewhat sheephisly and said, "I can't find your tree."

Well. We'd seen him bring it up to the pick-up area to trim it. So I'm not sure where he went riding off to look for it. But he was clearly puzzled. "I know it was here," he said, shaking his head.

Long story short, my tree disappeared. Someone else probably loaded it up and took it home, although the attendant was quite puzzled by this since they were not at all busy. The up side for me--I got a more expensive tree for the same price.

Now it just needs to be decorated!

Move over, Miss Piggy

As seen at Linda's place:

Rev. Dr. Mom --

[noun]: A real life muppet

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

The weather outside is frightful

~After a lovely snow on Thursday, and just a bit of a melt on Friday, I woke this morning to heavy snow. Really heavy snow. It was beautiful, but I had the early service and I'm thinking "no one is going to show up." When I get down to the church I turn on all the lights so people will know someone is there (since I walk down, no car in the lot to clue people in). To my amazement, five intrepid souls show up. And the snow removal guys come about the time the service started.

~But by 9 am, the lovely snow turns first to sleet, and then rapidly to heavy rain. Yuck. What a nasty mess. We have a smallish group at the 10 am service--about 50 (we usually have three times that). But given the weather, it's good.

~ The plow guys forget to do my drive when they plow the church parking lot, and it's ankle deep in slush by mid-afternoon.

~The temperature continues to rise all day, and the rain continues to fall. It's in the mid forties right now. But about 4 am the temperature is supposed to start falling, and it is going to be cold again tomorrow all day. Which means ice. Bah.

~Meanwhile, I still haven't bought my tree. Got there Friday just as they were locking up, no time yesterday, and weather too bad today. I think it's going to be a crazy week.

Books, books, books

I was tagged by the Caffeinated Priest, and it's one of my favorite topics....

Total Number of Books?

I have no idea, really. Hundreds. I keep running out of bookshelves, as I noted here, and I can't seem to stop buying books. (But nowhere near as many as my friend D!)

Last Book Read?

Last books I finished were The Powers That Be by Walter Wink and Practicing Peace in Times of War by Pema Chodron. I'm in the midst of Nonviolence: Twenty-five Lessons from the History of a Dangerous Idea by Mark Kurlansky. (Yes, there is a theme going there).

Last Book Bought?

Richard Scarry's Best Mother Goose Ever and a couple of others for my to-be granddaughter. Before that, a whole stack of books from the seminary bookstore, including a commentary on Matthew by R. T. France.

Five Meaningful Books?

The Book of Common Prayer has shaped my life in so many ways.

Lots of Madeleine L'Engle's books....Penguins and Golden Calves is one that helped me when I was first re-entering church. And Summer of the Great-Grandmother when my dad died. And lots of her fiction. (That could count for five right there!)

Evensong by Gail Godwin has some phrases and quotes that really resonate with me. It's a great story, and it's one of those books that I'll reread when I just want to get away from it all.

The Bible, and in that, I suppose the gospel of Matthew has shaped me more than anything else.

Kids' books--in general. I read sooooo much when I was a kid. I don't know what I would've done without books of all kinds.

Consider yourself tagged...

Red-bellied guy

Two years ago, when I had just begun feeding the birds here, I got a picture of a red-bellied woodpecker quite by accident. I was aiming at the feeder to focus, and while I was standing there s/he landed and I got a wonderful picture. Ever since then, the red-bellied woodpecker has been one of my favorite birds (along with the orioles). But they don't come to the feeder as often as the downy and hairy woodpeckers. In fact I hadn't seen one in a while. This morning there was a downy woodpecker on my (new) feeding station and I got my camera out to take a picture. The downy flew away but I happened to look up and see the red-bellied guy way up in a tree. Thanks to my 70-300mm lens and photoshop I got some great pictures.

Let it snow

~It started snowing about 11 am and it's snowed all afternoon. We decided early on to cancel our Advent program for tonight, and everyone else went home early. Taking advantage of the quiet, I spent the afternoon doing some much needed updating on the church web site.

~I still have a loonnnng list of things to do, but this afternoon felt unpressured. It was nice. But I hope the roads aren't bad tomorrow because I do need to accomplish some things. Really.

~I love watching the falling snow. It's so peaceful. Wish I could capture that feeling and save it for later.

December by the numbers

Inspired by Songbird

~Days til Christmas--14

~Sermons to write between now and Christmas--3

~Advent programs left to do--2

~Other extra church-related pre-Christmas activities to attend--4

~Christmas Eve services--3

~Christmas Day services--1

~Bulletins to prepare for week of Christmas (including weekends before and after because they all must be done by Dec. 21)--10

~Days til LD#1 comes home--9

~Days til NSLS and Mr. LS arrive--12

~Menus planned--0

~Presents bought--1

~Presents left to buy--many

~Trees to buy, put up and decorate--1

~Funerals this week--2

~Funerals last week--3

~Committee meetings this week--(even one is too many this time in December)--3

~Days I have off after Christmas--6--YAY!

'Tis the season

~Today was the annual holiday extravaganza at church. When I was a kid, this was called a bazaar, and there were lots and lots of things made out of felt. Now it's called a fair, and there is no felt in sight, but the food is about the same. Well, that's not entirely true, because there were never lobster rolls or clam chowder around when I was a kid. That was probably due as much to geography as to time though.

~I didn't have a specific job, so I wandered around taking pictures and helping out as needed. Parishioners (mostly the women) put a huge amount of work into this fair--they've been sewing and knitting and cooking and making wreaths and collecting things for a slient auction for months. Today's fair was a hit, I'd say, based on the amount of traffic in and out, and the paucity of the leftovers. And they made a pot of money, almost all of which will go to outreach.

~I'm predicting that attendance at church will be down tomorrow because a lot of folks will be at home, resting!

Firefox weirdness

~I still can't log into Blogger on Firefox on my Mac. It works everywhere else, and I have no trouble logging in on Safari on the Mac. So I'm not even sure where the problem lies--Blogger? Firefox? Somewhere in my computer? I just have no idea.

~This started after I went into blogger draft to change my comment settings. But why would that only mess up blogger in Firefox on my Mac, and nowhere else? Could be a total coincidence.

~Meanwhile I'm still using Safari which seems slower, but I guess that could be my imagination.

~A totally unrelated bit of nothingness: Why does "weird" not obey the "i before e except after c" rule?

ETA: I removed all the cookies associated with Blogger and voila! It works again!

Mocha latte

I decided to make myself a latte a few minutes ago. Instead of regular milk I used low fat chocolate milk. Delicious!

Names and titles

~Have you noticed how Senator Clinton is called "Hilary" and the other candidates are addressed by their last names? I'll admit that I've done it, too. And I know better.

~A commentator on NPR the other day pointed out that the Clinton campaign itself branded her "Hilary". This commentator also noted that even if it is her choice, using her first name only works against her being perceived equally as authoritative as the male candidates.

~I've seen this in academia and in the church as well. In Vermont we had one of the first women bishops in the Episcopal Church and she was adamant about being addressed in the same way a male bishop would be and not just by her first name. But it was an uphill battle.

~In my parish it's that way, too. My rector doesn't particularly want to be called Father Name--he'd just as soon go by his first name. But there is a contingent of parishioners who insist on using the title, so Father First Name or Father Last Name he is. But do you thing a single one of them has EVER thought to call me Mother Name? Not once. Even after parents asked me what their children should call me and I responded that they should use a title if they would for the rector, or just my name if that's what they would do for the rector.

~It's not that I mind being called by my first name--I don't mind at all. I just want to be treated the same way my male boss is treated. We're both priests.

~But what do you think would happen if we started referring to "Barack" and "John" and "Dennis"? It seems odd even as I type them. "MItt?" "Rudy?" It isn't going to happen.

So it's my birthday

(as some of you have already noted here and elsewhere--thanks!) I don't usually call attention to my birthday. We're not big celebrators in our family, and it's been a long time since I had a cake or presents or a party. But I've been thinking a bit about age lately and now seems as good a time as any to talk about it.

I'm 55 today. That sounds so OLD. My dad retired when he was 55 (mandatory retirement age for his job). I cannot even begin to imagine retirement. I just got started. I've done so many things in my life out of sequence--late mostly: college late, grad school late, first decent job late, ordination late, but some early (notably marriage and kids, although I did kids both ways, the first three when I was relatively young, and the last one in my late 30s.). I've always had friends who were older and younger than I--now I have friends who are the same age as my children. So even though I am firmly middle age, I don't see myself that way. Since NSLS announced that I would be a grandmother, I've taken to saying that I'm not a day over 35 inside. And if 60 is the new 40, then I guess that's about right.

The negative thing about this is that I've seen ageism on both ends--and I don't like it. It's especially hard as a newly ordained person. People complain that young clergy aren't always taken seriously, but the same is true for people like me. And while I want my younger colleagues to have lots of opportunites, to be taken seriously, I want those opportunities, too. I'm not included in many things targeted to more recently ordained people because I'm too old. And while there's a Young Women's Clergy Project, if there's one for older women, I sure don't know about it. Please don't think I am criticizing this project, either--I think it's wonderful. I'm just a bit envious. I'm not ready for the AARP or the let's-talk-about-retirement group. My interests and experiences are all over the place, which means that sometimes I don't fit in anywhere exactly.

The good part of my age (and I am truly grateful for every year I get) is that I do feel like I've learned some things over the years. I'm more comfortable in my own skin now. I could wish I'd acheived that earlier, but I didn't. And I look forward to doing much much more.

Because I'm an idealist, I wish for a world in which people weren't categorized and pigeon-holed by age...or gender or sexual orientation or ethnicity or nationality....but I'm not hopeful that world will be achieved any time soon.

Meanwhile, I think we should have a party here. Virtual cake, anyone?

Arghhhh.....

For some reason, Firefox won't let me log into blogger on my Mac. I'm using Safari now, which is okay I guess. For a while I thought it was a blogger issue--but I tried to log in on our old computer and it worked fine. I guess I need to uninstall Firefox and reinstall it.

I'm posting this more as a test to make sure everything is working than because I think anyone cares to read about my computer issues...

ETA I reintstalled Firefox but I'm still getting the same error message, which says something about Firefox detecting an address that will never open....and then it says that this problem sometimes occurs when cookies are disabled--but they aren't.

The Kid recommends I try a browser called "flock"--anyone familiar with it?

Commenting note

~Apparently Blogger has made some changes which meant that people with non-blogger, non-google ids had trouble leaving comments. So following Ianqui's tip, I've made it so that commenters can now sign in a variety of ways, including open id.

Spicyness

As seen at profgrrrrl's

Your Score: Fennel

You scored 50% intoxication, 50% hotness, 75% complexity, and 25% craziness!

You are Fennel!

You're a cool cat. Crisp, clean, fresh, and extremely complicated. You're like quantum physics or modern jazz. Think Niels Bohr meets Ornette Coleman. You may look normal now, but once you sprout, you look kind of, uh, funny.

Link: The Which Spice Are You Test

But I don't even LIKE fennel....

Weekend wrap-up

~Yesterday was the first Saturday I've had off--really off with no sermon to write or forum to plan or funeral to assist at or meeting to attend--in about six weeks, and it was nice. I did normal Saturday things: slept in a bit, read blogs, email and the NYTimes, did some errands and some laundry, and made clam chowder for dinner.

~It has been winter cold here the last few days. Tonight a few snow flakes fell--enough to look like a dusting of powdered sugar on the sidewalk and drive way, but that's about it. I don't mind it being cold--makes it feel more like December.

~I live on a street with lots of old--really old--houses. One of them, down in the village has just been nicely redone. Tonight as I drove home from some (more) errands, someone was putting up Christmas decorations on the postage stamp sized lawn--you guessed it: one of the dreaded blow up things--a carousel of all things, plus a fake light-up tree. It is so out of character for where it is. Maybe I'll get a picture and post it later.

~The Kid went to nearby city to hear Barack Obama tonight. I'll be interested in hearing his take on it. I don't think I've ever been to a campaign event. Bill Clinton came to grad school city during his first campaign, but I had to teach a class at the time he was there. And he came to Vermont during his second campaign, but again, I was teaching a class and couldn't go. Mostly I've lived in places where candidates don't find it worth their while to visit.

~Tomorrow is our third funeral in five days. This one is for one of the real matriarchs of our parish--director of the altar guild for 37 years--some of you will appreciate the import of that more than others! We have two more funerals scheduled for this month already, and one for January.

~As usual for me, I haven't really done much in the way of Christmas preparations. I'm always surprised by people who have their cards mailed and presents bought by early December. I shouldn't be surprised, but I am, nonetheless, year after year.

~Denial--especially about Christmas coming--is my game. I'm just saying.

Mold update

~The guy who came to check out the mold situation didn't seem to think there is anything to be worried about. There is a lot of mildew, but I am relieved that there is no real health issue. He was most puzzled by the mildew on the living room ceiling--probably from this summer, but still in an unusual place. Honestly I never really noticed it until the cleaning person pointed it out. It's faint, but visible. Clearly some work needs to be done to vent the crawl spaces better and keep the basement a bit drier, and see if that helps next summer.

NaBloPoMo by the numbers and other reflections

~30 posts in 30 days--actually 35 posts

~Most visits per day--103, yesterday

~Total visits for the month--2016, the most ever (still modest compared to most standards).

~Last year during NaBloPoMo I hit 10,000 visits, a little over a year after I started this blog. This year during NaBloPoMo, I crossed the 30,000 total visits line--I'm a couple hundred over at this point.

~Am I obsessed by the numbers? Ummmm, maybe at bit. It still fascinates me that people come here and read what I write.

~Like last year, I actually liked the discipline of committing to posting every.single.day, although many of my posts were mundane to say the least.

~Family angst once again gave me material to write about :(

~I didn't post as many photos as I would've guessed at the beginning of the month.

~What remains to be seen is whether I can keep the momentum I gained in November.

~It's been fun, y'all. Let's do it again next year.

Christmas-festivus-of-your-choice getting on your last nerve already?

Then this Friday Five is for you! And you don't have to be a revgalpal to play along...

Please tell us your least favorite or most annoying seasonal....

1. dessert~cookie~family food

~Candy canes that are bright colored and fruit flavored. Ewww. I'm a traditionalist here--red and white stripes and peppermint for me. The only deviation I like is cinnamon. But even that doesn't seem quite right.

2. beverage (seasonal beer, eggnog w/ way too much egg and not enough nog, etc...)

~I'm not sure I've ever had REAL eggnog, but the stuff that is in the carton--um, no thanks. I used to like it, but no more. Just as well too, from a fat and calories perspective.

3. tradition

~I'm probably going to offend someone here, but I've come to really dislike Santa in the mall. Not Santa per se, or visiting Santa, but Santa in the mall--with all the pressure to buy a package of pictures and the long lines, and just having to be in the mall. We were really lucky when the Kid was little because the college where I taught had a big Christmas party with Santa, and it was much lower key and a nicer experience. And I did take the older kids to the mall Santa when they were small, but it's just gotten kind of cheesy, imho.

4. decoration

~Those big blow up things on people's lawns. Nuff said.

5. gift (received or given)

~This might be an odd take on this, but years ago, when my siblings had all just gotten established as adults we decided to draw names for Christmas. I hand smocked a really beautiful (imo) night gown for my sister-in-law--that I found out later was never worn. And my (other) brother got my name and I didn't get a present at all.

~

BONUS: SONG/CD that makes you want to tell the elves where to stick it.

All the crap they play NONSTOP everywhere you go these day....I really like Christmas music, but that sort of ruins it for me.

Mold

~I live in a very humid place. I think I've complained here before about my shoes mildewing in the summer. Some of my winter clothes had mildew on them when I took them out. The leather chair in my living room got mildew on it this summer, as did the bookcase in the hall. I thought this was just what you had to put up with here, especially since I don't have air conditioning.

~The woman who cleans my house every other week mentioned once or twice how much mold she sees. I've noticed some a few places, but again thought it was just something you had to put up with here. And it's not like it's awful fuzzy stuff growing everywhere....more like grey or sometimes black spots, and I wasn't sure that it wasn't just spots that had been there forever. But the person who cleans mentioned it to her mother-in-law who just happens to work at the church and who just happened to mention it in the office. Well. I walked in yesterday to hear all sorts of discussion about my house going on.

~In this discussion I find out that, no, my shoes shouldn't mildew. And neither should my furniture. Who knew?

~So the maintenance guy all around handy man from church comes up and looks around. And tomorrow someone is coming to see if I do have a real mold problem. At the very least they will have to work on reducing the moisture in the crawl space and basement. And repaint.

~Tonight I was looking around. And sure enough, there are some grey spots on the ceiling in the living room and in the hall that I had never noticed. Could be mold. Could be something else.

~I won't mind if they repaint--since they promised to do it when I moved in two and a half years ago.

~Stay tuned for further developments.

Tears

What do you do when your daughter's heart is broken...and she's on the other side of the world? And there's nothing you can do to help?

LD#1 is brave and smart and strong, and has always wanted to make the world a better place. I hate that she has to experience something like this.

Hope for a miracle for her and the GS, okay? Hope that there is some justice left in the world.

Random bits of my week so far

~It's only Tuesday?

~I guess it's inevitable when you have a congregation that is heavily populated by older people, but we've been hit by a string of deaths in the last couple of weeks. It feels like we're losing a whole generation in just a few days.

~None of these deaths were unexpected. Most of them were people who had lived long and productive lives. But still....it's hard to see them go.

~LD#1 (who blogs as Woman Warrior) is in a rough spot now. I don't know how much she wants me to blog about it (she hasn't, yet), but the thing she has most dreaded happened this morning. She could use good thoughts and hugs.

~It's hard when your kid is on the other side of the world. I'm just saying.

~My post below had some subtexts that I think were missed. I thought about being more explicit, but decided against it. Some things just aren't bloggable.

~Although on reflection I don't hesitate to blog about my dysfunctional family...

~The weather here is schizo--cold one day and warm the next.

~The Kid announced that there are only 18 and a half school days until Christmas break. Yikes.

~I am in my usual late November denial about Christmas. Advent hasn't even started yet!

~The Kid got a new iPod Touch. I tried to post from it--the first time I actually posted to his old and now defunct blog and the second time it wouldn't work. But the iPod Touch is way cool.

~I may be the last person in the universe not to have an iPod. I've been planning to get a Nano, but the Touch is soooo cool. Also more expensive :(

~Today was cleaning day. It still makes me happy to come home to a spotless house that someone else has cleaned. That has to be the best present I've ever given myself.

~Tomorrow being Wednesday will be a crazy day. Too many meetings. All day. Gah. I don't mind meetings that are useful and productive, but for the most part, these aren't---they're more like something we have to do every week because that's what good staffs do.

~So maybe I'll go to bed early tonight...I often say I'm going to do that, but rarely follow through. Will tonight be the exception?

Schedules

In response to posts seen here and here, and since it is on my mind today anyway, here is how my weekly schedule works out:

~Monday is one of my days off, and usually it's a good day to be off. Sunday is generally an intense day in terms of being "on" and for an introvert like me, having Monday off is nice. And since it's early in the week I don't usually feel like I have a lot hanging over my head.

~Tuesdays start with small groups early in the morning. Every other week I meet with the men's group for Eucharist, breakfast and a book discussion beginning at 7:00 am. I really enjoy this--they are a group of mostly older men and very interesting. Later those mornings I meet with an intercessory prayer group and another book discussion. On the opposite Tuesdays I am teaching/leading a bible study--it's a lot like teaching a college class, and it's fun, but it requires prep work. This is a new group and I'm realizing that the prep works has a high probability of cutting into my Monday time off.

Unlike Coffeepastor and Cheesehead, I don't have set office hours. I tend to be in the office all day on work days unless I have hospital calls or meetings elsewhere. So I work on newsletters and bulletins and plan programs and schedule acolytes and so on.

~Wednesdays are busy days. I don't go in until around 9:30, but I have a mid week service at 10:00. Then I meet with the rector and the music minster for about 30 minutes. Then I meet with the rector. Then at 1:00 we have a staff meeting that includes everyone and lasts at least an hour. By then I'm fried, but sometimes I have more meetings, and once a month, vestry is on Wednesday night.

~Thursdays I go in voluntarily to attend an early morning Eucharist, breakfast and book discussion. This is just for me--I'm not technically working unless the rector is away. Thursday mornings I try to review the bulletins and write the prayers of the people. Thursday afternoons I finish up with that and work on whatever else is going on. Sometimes there are late afternoon or early evening committee meetings--lately there's been one every Thursday. At least one.

~Fridays are my other day off. Except once a month I have to go in for the Altar Guild meeting. I try not to work on Fridays other than that, but if it's my preaching week, I am thinking about my sermon, and if there's something going on on Saturday, then I have to write on Friday.

~Saturday morning is my writing time if it's my preaching week. I like to allow myself from 9:00 to 2:00 to write and edit. Then I have a service at 5:00 pm. If it's not my preaching week (and I preach every other week) and there are no other meetings or funerals or anything special going on, then I am off.

~Sundays when I am preaching I go down to the church about 7:20 and get everything ready for the 8:00 am service where I preach and celebrate. Between 9:00 and 10:00 I make sure everything is set for the 10:00 service, check up on the acolytes, go over my sermon if need be. Then at 10:00 I take the deacon role in the liturgy (which means that I read the gospel and set the table for Eucharist) and preach. Often after church there are meetings, and once a month there is an adult forum. After that, again barring anything extra going on, I'm off. On the weeks when I'm not the preacher, I arrive around nine to check on things, and then I'm the celebrant at the 10:00 service.

~That's how it works theoretically. But there are times when it is really, really hard to actually get the time off that is in the schedule and now is one of those times. Between Diocesan Convention and funerals and the newsletter my days off have been pretty irregular. I worked all day today to the newsletter done, and we have FOUR funerals in the next week--Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Monday. While I'm not officiating at any of them, I probably still need to be at three of the four.

~Note that I'm the assistant here. The rector does most of the pastoral visiting. And he is much better than I am at taking his days off (Monday and Tuesday). And he's rarely in the office past 2:00 pm. And his sermons are written by Friday afternoon. What's wrong with this picture? (Also note that he encourages me to take all my time off. I just don't see how to get everything done and not work on my days off).

~I was in academia before I went to seminary, and so I'm used to just working until everything is done--a state that is ephemeral at that. And I'm a bit of a perfectionist about work things which probably contributes to how much time I spend in the office.

~In seminary the importance of having a regular support group and scheduled study time were stressed. Note the absence of these in my schedule.

~Yeah, I'm feeling a little frustrated tonight (and very tired); I don't mean to be whiny but this was clearly a timely topic for me today.

~Now I have reading to do for my bible study in the morning--at least for as long as I can stay awake.

The Cranberry Wars

I love cranberries, and I make wicked good cranberry sauce (if I do say so myself). Although I grew up eating the canned jellied stuff, it really seems pretty fake to me these days.

My sole contribution to Thanksgiving dinner this year was cranberry sauce. But along with my sauce, there was a dish with the good old jellied stuff, complete with ridges from the can sides--because a couple of members of the extended family will eat ONLY what come out of the can.

Needless to say, there was a running debate on the relative merits (and the lack thereof) of homemade whole berry sauce and the standard canned jellied sauce. And a lot of jokes.

But the funniest part was when the leftovers came out for Friday lunch. When the container of jelled sauce was opened we found a new word inscribed in it: "Ziploc" (from the lid of the container) Now I ask you, what REAL food is that impressionable?

The mug meme

As seen at St. Casserole's ....but now with pictures!

Seven mugs from my cupboard:

1.

From the Episcopal Women's Caucus

2.
Seminary mug

3.
Paid way too much for this one and then dropped it, resulting in the web of cracks

4.
From an English tea shop in the Village--it has a mate and a matching tea pot

5.
From the Museum of Natural History

The last two require two pictures each...

6.


Unofficial class mug at seminary

7.



From a pottery shop in the Village

Anyone who wants to play, consider yourself tagged...

Post Thanksgiving Friday 5

From the RGBPs:

1. Did you go elsewhere for the day, or did you have visitors at your place instead? How was it?

~See posts below. We had a wonderful time at my daughter's inlaws' place.

2. Main course: If it was the turkey, the whole turkey, and nothing but the turkey, was it prepared in an unusual way? Or did you throw tradition to the winds and do something different?

Full menu: We started with appetizers early afternoon--clam dip, crab toasts, lobster rolls (little ones), mussles, butternut squash pot stickers with sage butter (!)

Main course: Turkey (large and traditionally roasted), stuffing, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, green bean casserole (but not made with canned soup, and far better!), brussel sprouts, cranberry sauce (both homemade and canned), delicious bread.

Dessert: Pumpkin pie, tarte tatin, and homemade maple ice cream

But wait--this morning we had crab and spinach quiche, and a Slovakian pastry whose name I've forgotten, and bagels, and some (but not me) had leftover lasgana.

And then Thanksgiving leftovers for lunch.

3. Other than the meal, do you have any Thanksgiving customs that you observe every year?

Not really

4. The day after Thanksgiving is considered a major Christmas shopping day by most US retailers. Do you go out bargain hunting and shop ‘till you drop, or do you stay indoors with the blinds closed? Or something in between?

I try to observe "Buy Nothing Day". I toyed with the idea of going to Target with NSLS, mostly because I haven't been in a Target since 1994, and everyone raves so about them, but we never made it. And when I drove by leaving town and saw the parking lot I was just as glad that I didn't go! Madness, I say, madness.

5. Let the HOLIDAY SEASON commence! When will your Christmas decorations go up?

Sorry, but for me Advent begins next weekend. The Advent wreath and Advent calendars (yes, plural) will go up then. Christmas decorations won't emerge until the week before Christmas, and they'll stay up until after 12th Night (January 6).

Back home again

So we're back home after a great Thanksgiving at NSLS's inlaws. We ate lots--and lots and lots--NSLS married into a family of fantastic cooks--and played Apples to Apples and took a walk and just chatted. We left mid-afternoon, and the traffic wasn't even too bad coming home. We passed a number of shopping centers with overflowing parking lots--ugh. There is NOTHING I want badly enough to join in that madness today.

The rest of the weekend is work I'm afraid--and first up, a sermon to write.

Over the river and through the woods

...not to Grandmother's house, but to NSLS's in-laws who live a couple of hours north of here. We'll have a sumptuous dinner and come back tomorrow.

And since food is one of the main features of the day, what is the food that it wouldn't be Thanksgiving without for you?

Mine are homemade cranberry sauce and cornbread dressing....I love all the rest, but those two are must haves, so whenever I go away for Thanksgiving, if I don't have those, I come home and make them the next day.

Hope everyone has a wonderful and (and delicious) Thanksgiving Day.

The no win situation

So the email was from my sister, chastising me for neglecting my mother and for preventing her from communicating with my kids.

Anyone who's read here very much knows that my relationship with my mother is and has been rocky. For reasons that I only partly understand she doesn't (for the most part ) approve of what I've done with my life--I'm sure she'd tell you how proud she is that I earned a PhD and she might say that she's proud that I became a priest (but honestly, I'm not sure about that one.) But she tells me all the time how selfish and uncaring I am, and how I've messed things up for my kids, and how with all my education and training I should do better. She doesn't always tell me directly, but she tells me. Some times we can have a decent conversation, but more often than not she gets upset by something I've said --and I swear that I don't try to provoke her.

Anyway, she's had a rough patch lately, and she's now in an assisted living facility in Disney City in the South where my sister lives, and she is confined to a wheelchair. I've talked to her a few times, but only briefly.

My sister's call was precipitated by a call my mother made to me. It came in the middle of a long afternoon of back to back meetings, and I couldn't talk. I called her back that evening but she didn't answer so I left a message. I should have known better. I should have realized that she wouldn't check her voice mail.

So three days later I get this email. My mother wants my daughter's address to send her a birthday card and if I won't talk to my own mother the very least I can do is not prevent her from contacting my children. Excuse me?

Then it's as if she's channeling my mother because I get the lecture that I've gotten periodically from her about how someone with my education and training should do better, should be more
... whatever. Maybe it's true, I don't know, but the lectures don't help.

I sent her NSLS's address and told her I'd respond to the rest of her message later. I've composed the reply in my head over and over--the snarky one, the mean one, the reasonable one. More than likely it won't matter what I say. My sister and I have a complicated relationship, too, and we couldn't be more different. I shouldn't care what she thinks of me. But that's easier to say than to actually feel.

All this does make me sad. Very sad.

Japanese maple in the sun

No win situation

So when someone in your family sends an email chastising you for being the evil awful person you are is it better to a) respond, thus confirming what an evil awful person you are, or b) ignore it, thus confirming what an evil awful person you are?

Sweet Sixteen

The Kid tells me that the "sweet" part only applies to girls, but anyway, he turned 16 today! No big celebration, just lunch out and some time looking at the new iPod Touch, which he wants badly.

A driver's permit can't be far behind...

On old notes and teaching

I've spent today prepping for an Adult Forum I'm leading after church tomorrow, and I've been dipping heavily into my notes from seminary. I know a few of my classmates ditched some or all of their notes at graduation, glad to be done with them, but school geek that I am, I saved ALL of mine, even for the classes I really disliked --like Church History 1.

This should come as no surprise to anyone who knows me. I only threw away my undergrad notes when I went off to seminary (and then I still saved a few of them). I still have some of my grad school notes, too, I think. In the back of my mind when I was going through things was the thought that if I ever went back to teaching, I would or least might need them.

I'm a good note taker and I've found useful things in old notes, things I'd forgotten that I had once known--or at least been exposed to. Today I've been going through notes from my liturgy classes and felt once again the excitement of being in those classes--they were part theoretical and part practical and they really helped me start feeling like becoming a priest was real.

The other thing I appreciate about going back to old notes is finding how things that I didn't fully grasp or appreciate at the time I see in a whole new way now after having lived with the material in real life for while. That happened sometimes when I was teaching, too--some concept I'd mostly but not completely understood suddenly because crystal clear to me as I thought about how to teach it, thought up new examples to use.

Over the last year I've starting doing more and more teaching at church--mostly in small groups--and I've really been enjoying it I hadn't especially missed teaching, but I'm finding what I am doing now very rewarding. Of course my audience (so to speak) is more motivated and interested than the average first or second year college student, and there's no grading involved :) Even better it motivates me to dig into material that I'm interested in but likely wouldn't take the time to do just on my own. I need external motivation,too.

And now I'd better finish up for tomorrow.

Outside my window

Tufted titmouse

Candidate quiz

In my previous post I mentioned internet quizzes that supposedly help you figure out which candidate is closest to your opinion on some the major issues. Here's one from abc news and here's another.

Let me hasten to add that I don't take these completely seriously--they're just sort of amusing. In reality the choices they give in the answers often don't contain what I really think. And the truth is that any candidate I agreed with on everything probably wouldn't be electable.

Eeny meeny minie mo

My state is considering joining in the rush and moving up the date of its presidential primary to February 5. Which means that I need to start paying more attention and deciding who to vote for. When I take those internet quizzes that are supposed to help you figure out which candidates best match your positions on the major issues, I invariable come up with Kucinich. But I'm not voting for him. I'd love to give my whole hearted support to Hilary Clinton as the first really viable woman candidate, but I just can't do it. There are things I like about Obama, and about John Edwards. But I'm not really sold on anyone just yet.

And doesn't it feel like they've all been campaigning forever already? And it's still a year til the election....

Questions, questions

At the beginning of NaBloPoMo Liane asked me:

-When did you know you wanted to be a priest, and when did you know you were going to be a priest?

I wrote about the first part of this question (about knowing I wanted to be a priest) last year. As to the second part, about knowing that I would be a priest, it sounds like a simple question, but it really isn't. My bishop was always very careful about saying that ordinations were not set until the Standing Committee (a committee that helps oversee the diocese) gave its final consent, so I guess that's when I really knew it was going to happen.

But as for feeling like I was really going to be a priest, I think that happened gradually during seminary. I mean, you start out in a grad program like any other grad program in many ways, and you look around at your classmates and think, holy crap, we're all going to be priests! And you live in community with those people where everyone's idiosyncrasies and warts and flaws eventually show themselves, and you go through a lot of stressful experiences together. And suddenly one day you realize that you are starting to think of this or that person as a PRIEST and to see them living into that role. And you do something you'd never quite believed you could do and you think, maybe I CAN do this. I think it must be like this for med students or other people in professional programs. You take on the identity unawares, and at some aha moment start to really believe it.

-What was the best part of the discernment process for you? the worst?

Anyone who has ever been in the discernment process will tell you that it's stressful at best and excruciatingly awful at worst. I think the best part for me was the affirmation and support I received from people--in my home parish, at the job I ultimately left, from people I met in random ways. When things were rough--and they sometimes were--there was always someone who could help me pick up the pieces and gain some perspective. My bishop was brand new when I was meeting with the Commission on Ministry and my first meeting with him was pretty intimidating. But he quickly became my ally, and once I became a postulant it was clear that he wanted to do everything he could to support me.

As for the worst part--I have two responses, one specific and one general. Everyone has to have a psychological evaluation and I was required to see both a psychiatrist and a psychologist. Apparently (although I didn't realize it at the time of the appointment) the psychiatrist and I didn't connect very well. In hindsight, I think that we were coming from two very different places, and that he didn't ask kind of questions that would elicit the kind of answers that he later said he would've liked. In the end, everything worked out, but for a while it seemed like that this one thing could stand in the way of me going forward, and I really felt like he didn't get me at all. But it's tough to say that in such a situation, you know?

In general, going through this process require one to lay oneself bare, to make oneself very vulnerable, and it's scary. The outcome is uncertain. It's potentially life-altering, and it sometimes feels like one little thing, one misunderstanding or misstep could easily disrail everything. I don't know how I would've handled it if I hadn't successfully made it through the process after investing so much in it, but that does happen to people. I can say now that the stress and all that went along with it was worth it, but if you don't make it, that's a whole other story.

Any more questions?

Ten random things about me

No one tagged me, but I'm doing it anyway. The challenge, however, is thinking of ten things I haven't told about myself already. Hmmmmmm....

1. I like to doodle. I doodle at meetings all the time. I have pages and pages of doodles.

2. I don't like mushrooms or olives, things most people love.

3. But I love okra and brussel sprouts, which many people find repulsive.

4. I always paint my toenails during the summer but never my fingernails.

5. I wear a toe ring and a thumb ring. My sister thinks this is extremely bizarre.

6. My sister thinks most of what I do is extremely bizarre.

7. I only wear silver jewelry. I would wear white gold, but I don't have any.

8. My middle name is my mother's maiden name. I hated that when I was a kid because everyone else had 'regular' names for middle names, like 'Ann' or 'Elizabeth'.

9. I didn't name any of my children with family names. Now I sort of wish I had. But I do like their names.

10. I've never been to the west coast. Or to Europe, except for Iceland. I really want to go to England and Scotland some time, but I have to get over my fear of flying.

Thoughts evoked by Veteran's Day

Because I live in an area that is a popular retirement destination, the congregation where I minister has many veterans--primarily World War II veterans. These folks (mostly but not all men) are extraordinary people. Now in their 80s they still bear the scars of the war that in many ways shaped their lives. Several served on submarines. One flew in bombers, was shot down and spent many months in a German POW camp. Another survived the Bataan death march. They tell amazing stories--stories of the war, and stories of coming home, rebuilding lives that were interrupted by that war. They exemplify what has come to be called 'the greatest generation."

I have tremendous respect for these veterans. They are to a person active and committed, and have crafted lives that included not only building careers and and raising families but also serving their communities. But I still get uncomfortable when holidays like Veterans Day and Memorial Day roll around. I'm uncomfortable with too much overt patriotism. I don't believe in "my country right or wrong." Hearing the national anthem doesn't bring tears to my eyes. I don't say the pledge of allegiance because I fail to see the flag as something meriting that kind of devotion, and because too often lately it is associated with attitudes and behaviors I object to.

I wrote about my discomfort with our flag-waving tradition in church before. Out of respect for people I regard highly, I don't say anything about it. I just sort of nod and smile when people leaving church comment on how it moved them. Sometimes I wonder just what it is that makes me so--so what?--ambivalent at best and hostile at worst--to something that so many people view so positively. But I just can't buy into patriotism as it's currently construed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I was a senior in high school, I won a statewide essay contest sponsored by the VFW. The topic was what it meant to me to be a patriot. I wrote the essay as a class assignment, and promptly forgot about it, so I was surprised to be notified that I had won a prize. And honestly, a little bit embarrassed. Because even then I wasn't a flag-waving patriot. Even then (in the waning years of Vietnam) I had deep reservations about the way this country and it's leaders interacted with the rest of the world and treated its own citizens.

I grew up the child of southern liberal democrats. My parents didn't talk about politics much, but somehow I knew how they felt about things. They were part of the generation that enthusiastically elected JFK, supported civil rights and and thought the war on poverty was a good thing, and I somehow absorbed that. But my junior high and high school years were years of tumult--assassinations (MLK and RFK), riots, increasing discord over Vietnam, Kent State, debates about the draft. My skepticism about unquestioning nationalism developed in the midst of all this. I wrote my senior civics paper on why we shouldn't have draft, and I wanted nothing more than to join the Peace Corps and serve the world, not just the U.S.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ironically perhaps, my high school boyfriend and later husband enlisted in the Navy right after graduation. For the 12 years that we were married, I lived in military communities with people who chose the military as their career, and who were for the most part much more conservative than I, and much more invested in the idea that the United States was without question superior to other countries. To say that there was a certain amount of cognitive dissonance which grew over the years would be an understatement. But I was much quieter then, not so outspoken, and mostly I kept my beliefs to myself.

There were times, though, when I chafed at the attitudes of some of those around me. When I went to Iceland I was frankly taken aback at the attitudes of many of the Americans stationed there. They could not seem to understand why the Icelanders (who were very protective of their culture and their population--understandable given their size) wouldn't think that everything American was superior to anything Icelandic. They saw no reason to explore the country or to learn the language or experience the culture. It was an eye-opening experience for me. I know that I have benefited greatly from being born and raised in this country, and that to a certain degree I owe it my loyalty. But why wouldn't people born and raised other places feel the same way about their own countries? Why should they revere the U.S. above their own homelands? And if I'm lucky enough to be immersed in a different place, why wouldn't I both respect it and learn more about it?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In a post earlier this week I talked about the tension that sizzled in the air at our diocesan convention when we debated a resolution about the military, particularly about the ethics of recruiting practices in high school. I live in a pretty blue state, but even here the sentiment that it's not okay to criticize the military too much is prevalent. I will not criticize troops fighting in a war they have little control over, but I don't think it is disrespectful of them to question the ethics of our involvement in war or of the tactics employed by the military in war or out of it. When we lose the ability, the right to question and even to be critical, we are in a scary and dangerous place.

And therein lies at least part of my discomfort with patriotism as it seems to be understood these days. It's one thing to be loyal to one's country; it's another thing entirely to accept without question every action of that country, especially when those actions seem to violate the principles on which the country was founded. It's one thing to be grateful for the privileges I've enjoyed simply because I was born in a particular place; it's another to think the accident of my birth gives me any kind of inherent superiority over anyone else.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I don't have a copy of that essay I wrote in high school, and I don't remember everything I wrote. I do recall one bit of it. Even then I argued that being a patriot meant more than waving a flag. Being a real patriot meant working to make one's country a better place to live, questioning the status quo, upholding the rights of the disenfranchised. I think that's what the veterans in my parish embody. But I'm afraid that they are literally a dying breed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I don't think it's wrong to feel pride in one's home, nor to feel loyalty to one's heritage. But I wonder if it's possible for humans to nurture these feelings without them blossoming into the kind of nationalism and ethnocentric thinking that leads to territoriality, racism, war and even genocide? I just don't know.

Saturday

~I got up early this morning to work on my sermon. Normally I plan on having from around 9 to 2 to write it, but I had to be at church at 11 this morning, so I started writing yesterday. I had a sort of rough draft to work with this morning, but I wasn't liking it much, so I rewrote most of it pretty quickly. It was better but still not quite done.

~I had to be at church at 11 to prepare for a funeral. It was a sad funeral--they are all sad on some level, but when a person has lived a long life and died well, it's sad in a different way. Today's funeral was for a man who died too young and in sad circumstances. Makes you think a lot about life. It was a good funeral though--beautiful music--his parents are both musicians and their friends sang--and a feeling of mourning and saying good-bye in a meaningful way.

~After the funeral I went back to finish my sermon, and suddenly it all just came together. Weird how that works sometimes.

~It was a dark and cold and windy day. Feels like winter is coming for sure. Remarkably there are still leaves on some of the trees. It seems like they should all be gone by now--especially after last week's storm.

~NaBloPoMo is sort of dragging along this year...I don't seem to have much to say or when I think of something I don't have time to write it. Maybe we need a few memes or something. Anyway, I'll try to think of something substantive tomorrow. I have two questions to answer--anybody want to ask some more?

Random bits of Friday

~I really need to get my sermon done--or at least mostly done--tonight. I've been working at it all day, but I'm not making any progress. Ack.

~We stopped in Borders for a few minutes tonight, and without thinking about it I wandered into the kids' section and started looking at some of my kids' old favorites. And then I thought--I can start buying kids books again!* I love buying kids' books.
*for my granddaughter-to-be

~But I am not so ready to think about Christmas. And they had (shudder) pink and black Christmas trees in Borders (shudder).

~I have "Tiki-tiki-tembo-no-sa-rembo" stuck in my head. I can never remember the rest of the name, but I must've read that book to the Kid 1000 times at least.

~From now til the first of the year is going to be wicked busy at work. Wicked busy. Somehow I've ended up editing the newsletter and proofreading all the bulletins. And maintaining the web page. And writing pamphlets. None of which are really in my job description. I like doing all those things but they are collectively a major time suck. And then there are the extra Advent and Christmas activities.

~It's starting to be cold. It's time I guess. We've just had such a weird fall that I don't feel ready for cold yet.

~Back to sermon writing now.

Recipe

As promised....

My mother began making this at Christmas time when my kids were little, and it quickly became a family favorite. I'm still using a copy of the recipe written on a piece of notebook paper by NSLS who called Grandma to get it the first Christmas we lived in Vermont because we couldn't have Christmas dinner without pineapple! The original recipe called for only 2 cans of pineapple, but I make it with more.

Baked Pineapple

3 (20 oz) cans chunk pineapple, drained
6 T self-rising flour (I generally don't have self-rising, so I add a pinch of salt and a little bit of baking powder, about 1t I'd guess).
1 cup sugar (I never use a whole cup, more like 3/4)
2 cups shredded cheese (your favorite cheddar--I've also successfully used Cabot's 50% reduced fat or a mix of cheddar and mozzarella)
1 tube Ritz crackers
1 stick of butter, melted

In a 9x13 baking dish mix the pineapple, flour and sugar until well combined. Stir in the cheese. Crush the crackers and mix with the butter; sprinkle evenly over the pineapple mixture. Bake in a 350 degree oven for 30 minutes.

Incredibly easy and really, really good. It's a very forgiving recipe--you can add more pineapple or more cheese to suit your taste.

Word play

If misogyny is hatred of women, why isn't there an equivalent word for hatred of men? Misanthropy doesn't really work because that is hatred of humankind.

When I was in grad school, a classmate and I spent hours and hours trying to find such a word and couldn't. I can think of all sorts of interesting implications of this....what do you think?

ETA: Thanks to random thinker, I have a new word misandry. I've posed this word question at other times and no one has ever come up with this word before. Apparently this word came into usage between 1945 and 1950, while misogyny came into usage in the 1600s. Still interesting...

ETA2: Although I found this word in a couple of on-line dictionaries, it's not in my Merriam-Webster Collegiate Dictionary (10th ed. 1998).

On war and peace, sort of

Every year at diocesan convention clergy and lay representatives vote on a number of resolutions. Some of those resolutions deal with the practical workings of the church--budget matters, for example, but others serve (when passed) as mandates calling for action or study on various social issues. This year one such resolution called for the diocese to initiate " a comprehensive analysis and discussion of the current U.S. military system" and a "dialogue and debate about the morality of methods used by military recruiters, especially in impoverished neighborhoods." It also asked that the diocese "consider the moral, ethical, theological, and legal ramifications of Christian involvement in war."

The proposers of this resolution and its supporters spoke movingly of young people known to them who had been killed in the war or who were suffering from PTSD or who had taken their own lives because they couldn't stand the stresses of the military life and war. All of these young people were members of minority groups and were recruited using high pressure tactics in their schools.

I knew that this resolution would provoke a great deal of debate. Even in this very liberal state there exists a wide variety of opinions about the military. Much of the discussion focused on military recruiters in high schools and the way they (seem to) target kids from low-income backgrounds. Two thing about this discussion surprised me. First, several speakers suggested that the best way to keep recruiters out of schools and ensure that the poor were not targeted was to reinstitute the draft. Second, and more surprising, were the youth who argued in favor of having recruiters in the schools and who defended their practices.

Some of these young people had some connection with the military--a parent, a sibling a friend. To a person they defended military recruiters as "no worse" than college recruiters. Perhaps. But my gut response was that these young people lacked the perspective to see how their peers were targeted, to understand the pressures, to appreciate the consequences of joining the military (as opposed to choosing one college over another). But at the same time I realize how paternalistic such response on my part would sound.

Most distressing, I think though, was realizing just how difficult it was to have this conversation, even in its preliminary stages. You could feel prickles of tension in the air--from those who perceive any such discussion as a slur on those who have served in earlier wars and those who serve now, and from those who feel, either because of their own service or that of others or because of deep convictions that our military, our imperialism are in danger of running amok. I am biased, I admit, towards the latter position, So I wonder: How can we come to a place where we can honestly question things like the military without being perceived to be anti-American, dishonorable in some way? More importantly, when will it really sink in that if we don't end war, war will end us?

This resolution was ultimately returned to committee for further consideration. I'll be interested to see if it ever resurfaces.

Storm redux

Leaves were plastered on the windows like this, too. I was afraid the chairs would blow away, but somehow they stayed put.


The big oak tree in my back yard


Another branch of the same tree


Carpet of leaves


My driveway

All of this is very minor compared to some place I've driven by. The road I live on has stretches where it is lined with very large old trees. A few are uprooted in every big storm, and this one was no exception. And sometimes they get hollow and then split open during a storm. It's quite a sight, but it usually also blocks traffic and wreaks havoc on the power lines.