Home Again, Home Again

We drove home on Thursday, having extended our time in VT as long as we could. The Kid had been sleeping on the couch, and allowed as how he'd be glad to be back in his own bed, and he was anxious to connect with friends. As for me, I had a workshop on Friday night and Saturday to begin to prepare for a new youth program we are putting in place this fall (J2A for those who know about such things).

I knew I would feel torn about leaving--it was really wonderful spending time in City by the Lake, pleasant and relaxing, and I remembered once again why I had loved living in that area--but I didn't expect the feeling of depression that seemed to settle over both of us as we drove in the driveway. So I focused on getting busy--filling the bird feeders, unpacking, starting to think about work again, and the Kid went to the library across the street to stock up on movies, and signed on to IM to let everyone know he was back.

I've been thinking a lot about why I feel discontented here; there are lots of reasons, but the truth is, I have to find a way to make this place feel like home, since I think we'll be here for a while--a year or two more at least. I've always been able to adapt to where ever I was living, but it is proving to be more difficult this time. And we've been here a year this week.

I've also felt like I've been caught in this weird time warp. The Kid didn't get out of school until just a few days before we left for vacation, and it hadn't been very warm, so I felt like I was still waiting for summer. Now, not quite three weeks later, I'm looking at the calendar and thinking how soon summer will actually be over, since we are almost half way through July. It's warmer and the humidity of summer has arrive, and the backyard, the area between the stone wall and the pond, has taken on a jungle-like appearance.

Part of this time warp feeling comes, I think, from not being on an academic schedule anymore. Back when I was a student or teaching, summer psychologically began in May and stretched out almost endlessly ahead of me. Suddenly it feels shrunken. We do have more summer plans to look forward to; the challenge for me is to not just let all of summer slide by before I know it.