Adding my voice

Perhaps it's a truism that we don't really appreciate our rights until we don't have them. When I was growing up I played "wedding" every chance I had, I dreamed about being a bride, I knew that no matter what else I did, I'd surely get married. And it was easy (maybe too easy) for me to do so--something I took completely for granted. But for my friends who happened to grow up gay or lesbian, that's not the case.

I never really thought much about same sex marriage until I moved to Vermont, where I happened to teach with one of the litigants in the court case that led to the passage of the nation's first civil union law. Listening to the debate, the rhetoric that was often ugly, juxtaposed with hearing my colleague talk about his love for his partner and their desire to have their relationship recognized and protected like any other couple helped me realize that there really is no compelling reason why same sex couples should not marry. (Let me add that I would extend this to religious as well as civil marriage).

Beyond that belief, though, is another thing: Civil rights should NEVER be put to the vote. The oppressor is seldom going to vote to extend rights to the oppressed. If integration had needed voter approval I suspect there are places that would still be segregated. Same sex marriage is no different. The courts have weighed in and determined that the rights and protections of marriage should be extended to same sex couples, and that should not be up for referendum.

Susan, over at Crunch Granola, wrote this the other day:

Proposition 8 is a California initiative that would eliminate the rights of California's same-sex couples to marry. As the most excellent No on 8 site explains, Proposition 8 is unnecessary, unfair, and just plain wrong. Lesbians and gays want to get married for the same sorts of reasons that straight people want to get married: we want to make a commitment to our partners; we want to assert our family status; we want our families to be protected in the event of tragedy...We love, we fight, we cook, we clean, we travel, we work, we snooze. We have big families, small families, and families in between. We eat meat, we're vegetarians, we participate in religious communities, or not. We live in the country and in the city. In the United States, we enjoy far more legal protections than at any other point in our history, but Proposition 8 could be a major setback to the marriage movement.

I can't vote in California but I'm adding my voice to the cause, and urging any of you who do live in CA to vote no on 8. I'm lucky to live in the first state to legalize same sex marriage, and I will do everything I can to protect that right for my gay and lesbian friends here. What about you?