2009~Looking ahead

This first morning of the new year has dawned bright and beautiful--pristine snow blanketing the ground, a brilliant blue sky and bright wintry sun--this is what winter should look like. It's cold and blustery but I don't have to go anywhere, so it's all good.

I don't really believe in omens, but if I did, I think I'd say that such a bright new year's day might be an omen for a bright shiny year. Nah, maybe I wouldn't say that, but it did get me thinking about the year to come. I don't really make resolutions any more--they were almost always the same and I was never any good at keeping them--but last year profgrrrl wrote about having a theme for the year, and I kind of like that idea. And it only takes me a skinny minute to come up with this year's theme: Change.

Yes Change with a capital C. This is the year when the Kid will graduate from high school and go off to college. This is the year when I will take over for almost four months while my boss is on sabbatical. This is the year when I start to live alone for the first time ever. This is the year when I must--really must because I won't be in next year's budget-find a new position. This is the year that we finally get rid of Bush et al. !!! All good change, but change nonetheless.

I've done change before; I know what it feels like to have kids go off to college (exciting and sad) and what it's like to find a new job and move (daunting and challenging in a good way). I've done multiple changes in one year, so I'm not totally unprepared. But I know that change is hard, that things don't always go the way you want them to, that the unexpected happens. Large parts of what I'll be doing (the job search part especially) will be unbloggable, but I'm sure you'll hear lots about the rest, because one thing I've learned is that writing stuff down here really does help--both the catharsis of writing and the comments y'all leave.

And the thing is, if change is going to be a theme, not just what happens, I need to be proactive, to think and reflect and do. I can't be in control but I can be aware--at least on some level, some (most) of the time. I can work at not fearing the change but embracing it--grieving for good things gone by to be sure but also looking with joy to the opportunities that change brings.

And right now I'm feeling pretty hopeful about the year to come.